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#93

Whose torch am I carrying and why?

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From "100 Of The Most Powerful Questions You Can Ask Yourself"

Nothing has the power to completely alter perspective and therefore your thoughts and actions and life quite like a question. Inquiry leads to understanding. The quality of the answers we arrive at, correspond directly to the quality of question we ask. The better the question, the better the answer. One of the most important things to realize about a question is that a person learns far, far more from the process and work involved in answering a question than from the answer itself. This is why spiritual teachers throughout history (including myself) have tended to pose so many questions to their students rather than to simply offer a direct answer. For this reason, I have selected a collection of 100 of the most powerful questions that you can ask yourself.

Make sure to take time to carefully consider each question that is posed in order to meaningfully answer them. And don’t forget to come back to these questions again and again throughout your life, especially whenever you are feeling stuck, because the answers will most likely change over the course of your life and also cause you to change your course in life.

- Teal Swan


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On a subconscious level I carry a torch of society- their views and I do it because it makes me feels safe, in comfort, being provided for......deeply and courageously I carry the torch of my inner knowing feeling to help of teal Swan, oneness consciousness and dream within of living with like minded people, off the grid, intensively in the healing work and spreading the fruits of that to the world.

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My moms approval and expectations, to not let her down so I can have that “special relationship” and sense of belonging, to feel temporary self esteem and pride sense of self and purpose which is nonetheless completely false, if I wouldn’t do this I’d feel directionless like my compass keeps spinning round and round and round and I’m full of fear it feels like dying and I’m running away from it by doing this.

actually I could insert anyone in here that I ever had awareness of and I will self insert what I think would please that person fictional and non fictional. 

 

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I don't really get this question. But the previous comments help. Um I think a torch for truth? Or for everyone's emotions to be recognized and validated. Maybe because I can help others get in touch with their feelings? I'm already on this path so this is getting it more clear.  

But I guess the shadow torch would be...my family (like siblings and dead parents)...like I keep wanting them to love me for me. And they repeatedly are never available for that. 

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I carry my own torch because otherwise no one will carry it for me. And the last thing I want is to carry someone else's torch. I'm also a kind of person who could use this torch as a weapon on occasion. Angry at people and society

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none. it's not even extinguished, it was never lit to begin with. In fact, all of me is extinguished now. I'm over this. just cant do this shit anymore. I'm tired of living. Tired of trying. Tired of being worthless. Tired of everything. Just tired. Tired of coming back to this shit planet and shit existence, just to learn that I'm in shit shape and beyond repair. To hell with it. All this shit is pointless. I did ALL THIS just to come back to this shit and realise that. I'm done.

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I did not get this question either so for anyone who wants to know

carrying a torch- to secretly and/or unrequitedly love someone and not let it go (whatever the hell love means, even Teal has two different meanings for it, trust me I have studied her work for literal years look at her articles "What is Love" and " Unconditional Love, How to Love Unconditionally" both are good articles just confusing.... is love taking someone as part of the self or is it unconditional positive focus, it cannot be "and" conciousness and be both some things need a definition...that and a few other things make me think Teal makes shit up on the fly sometimes.....ok semi-tangential rant over)

I guess all the famous people who have what I want. Have all of the needs met I want met etc. Seem like superior people in society. 

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I feel the burden of carrying humanity's and the environment's torch. I feel pressure; feel like there's not enough time left to do what "needs to be done", like I have a difficult mission to fulfill, even though I'd much rather spend my time doing something fun.

I feel that I must succeed. There's a deep nervousness and fear of failure in me and those are the only things motivating me to strive towards my mission. If not for that, I'd just chillax.

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I carry the torch of my father and his father, my grandfather, who was in WW2, a soldier, fighting in Poland and Russia. I feel his energy in my father, hurting me and in me, hurting myself. His wounds, his rage, his brutality, his cholerical behavior, his aggression. And still, I carry this torch, long time without knowing about the reason. But now I understand, that he was betrayed about his life. I understand why he became an offender. My system knew all the time, I was long term fighting against my wish to stand up for him and fighting against my own system. Now I understand him being also a victim of war-system. 

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I carry my torch for me and the next generations I have an amazing understanding of how trauma affects a child and how it gets carried on through generations if I do the hard work break that link Each year the transgenerational trauma will get that bit better and hopefully one day humanity will be free of it,

it has to start somewhere and I’m willing to do it

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Ough... tooooo many. The one others pick for meXD

Edit: I use to refere to as putting on shoes that dont fit me. 

In one version of cinderella the stepmother probably forced the stepsisters too cut of their toes in order to fit in those shoes. ..

And this is the pattern and the boundarie I let others cross with me, cause I have grown up with this and I am used to it, and I do ti without complains and a smile on my face. Though those fucking shoes will never fit me. And it hurts.

Edited by LucyMad
Just to be more me
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The Hyde name and the Dna of my ancestors.  The why? When i figure out why organic life lives to reproduce i will get back to you on that one.

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I'm carrying the family torch, I'm everyone's dark side, I am the villain.

cause I've been the supposed to be a minimi version of my parents child (who would make my family look good) and the scapegoated child at the same time, aswell. 

I think, I've become a highly destructive individual. 

I remained the scapegoat, and casted most of the positive traits within me out my parents own and tried to instill within me, and took on negative traits they own, it's a passive try to make them see and change and wake up. 

But I'm honestly done with them. For good. It's more like a coping mechanism. 

I've been homeless a couple of times over the last 2 years, and I needed them. (I didn't want them) and they used me the same way if not worse, so where "good"XD

Or more like never going to be:) 

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