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  2. Auryn

    The Re-Do

    So excited for the energy diagnosis of Hawaii! I'm half Polynesian and have always noticed the dissonance in realities between people on Hawaii. It can feel lonely and frustrating. The native Polynesians feel invisible/wronged/pushed aside sometimes, and all locals struggle to make a living (it's so expensive there), while vacationers treat the island like Disneyland, not always appreciating the cultures that have lived and thrived there for generations.
  3. Today
  4. MercedesC

    The Re-Do

    I wonder if/how you ever resolved things with the other speaker? She was a bit snarky to me for being on stage with you for so long and I think it was kind of intoxicating to get caught up in the us vs them energy. I’m simultaneously drawn to hear about the conflict because of that intoxicating effect but more so to see how it could be integrated and resolved.
  5. The problem with what you call exotic fruits is that many of them are sprayed with different substances because they have to travel long distances before it arrives to your table!
  6. Loyda

    The Re-Do

    I completely know what you mean, Teal, by Hawaii being extreme opposites for people, depending on their perspective. I met many while I lived there for 10 years who felt they had island fever, stuck on a rock, saying "but I don't surf." Neither did I but it didn't stop my love for the place. Can't wait to read your next blog on your energetic diagnosis of Hawaii!
  7. Oliv1

    Teal's Safe Space

    This really looks like Norway! Is Teal coming to Norway any time in the future?
  8. 11:20 Feeling OVERWHELMED, overworked. This is very true. All supervisors need to see this. Some spouses need to understand this. This video makes me want to scream, "Help!". Unrelenting subservience leads to a lack of trust. I'm at a loss of words also.
  9. Teal

    The Re-Do

    A few years ago, I was hired to give a talk with other leading women in the field of health and wellness at a retreat center on the East Coast of the United States. The original idea for the talk was that we would come together to teach a group of women about healing from sexual trauma and sex abuse. None of us had met each other before and because we were all too busy to really collaborate on the course, we each planned to talk for a day. But shortly before the event, we ran into a problem when the center itself wanted to distance itself from ‘sexuality’ or ‘sex abuse’. The decision was made to change the title of the workshop to “Goddess Retreat”. When I showed up at the center and met one of my other co-hosts for the event, Dr. Laura Berman, the connection we had was immediate. Sometimes you meet someone and it is just easy to be around them. That is how it was with us. It was cozy. She made me laugh so hard that first day, my stomach hurt. Even though we were adults, it felt like she was that friend I would have been hiding under the table and giggling with in kindergarten. The event itself was an interpersonal disaster. Having not collaborated on the course all together, we did not see (until it was too late) that some of our philosophies of healing drastically clashed with one another. It was more like watching a political debate than a cohesively led workshop. We ended up putting the audience in a state of cognitive dissonance where they had to essentially choose between my method and another speaker’s method, knowing they were diametrically opposed. Also, needless to say, what most people have in mind when they hear the words “goddess retreat” is not facing and owning their shame and diving deep into their trauma. The atmosphere became very heavy and cathartic. Many people were totally blown away in a good way by the experience. Some were upset at the experience being so different than advertised. It created serious opposition and unresolved conflict between myself and the speaker whose method I unintentionally taught directly against. But two good things came out of that experience, one was my connection to Laura and the other was the desire to actually create what we had failed to create at that time. We finished filming our project last week. Dr. Laura Berman and I paired up to create a video series to help people heal from sexual trauma, including sex abuse. We broke from tradition and decided to do the series with two women, live and on set. We did this not only to show how healing from relational trauma (which is what sexual trauma is) is dependent upon doing it with other people, but also to show a snap shot of actual sexual trauma healing taking place. It is different to watch two people talking directly to a camera than it is to watch two people talking directly to someone that represent the demographic they are talking about. I am happy with the result. I am aiming to have it out to the public as soon as possible. And having finished the course, I boarded a plane to Hawaii. Tomorrow is the first day of my curveball retreat here on the big island. I have surveyed the island and visited some sacred sites. I will be releasing a blog with the energy diagnosis of Hawaii later this week or early next week. It is intensely jarring on the system to go from the cold and pristine magic of a land covered in snow to the hot and tropical sacred sites of an island surrounded by the Pacific Sea. My body is disoriented. As a result, I have spent a great deal of time with a troupe of Koi fish that occupy a beautiful Zen pond in the living room of the house I am staying in here on the island. It is so interesting to me (being in this place that most people are desperate to visit in their lifetime) how a place can be perceived as a heaven or a hell based off of a person’s individual experience there. One of my closest friends is from this Island. While other people spent time in heaven on vacation on the beaches here, he was isolated here on a coffee farm with the emptiness of no social connection or belonging. I can see both worlds so clearly driving around this place… How different the living here is from the vacationing here… The rift between the natives and the non-natives… How bad it can be for one person to be here and how good it can be for another. Any object will look different depending on what perspective you have of that object. Each perspective is a different angle on something. Our perspective shapes our experiences and our experiences shape our perspective. Hawaii is one of those places with many angles. More so than most places on earth, it will look drastically different depending on the perspective you look at it through.
  10. Yesterday
  11. Lesa Spravka

    Ski Jump

    How cool that you could see the performance so well against the night sky.
  12. Lesa Spravka

    Teal's Safe Space

    Love Love Love Love Love.
  13. Wildwestrom. ....how do I put this? ....You're letting your ego take control of you. You know, how the ego functions as a self-sustain mechanism, by sharpening your awareness to specific threats and dangers, that you come to learn through your life-experience? Let's just say, ego in general, is a hypeman. A hypeman that picks up a threat, and keeps blowing it out of proportion. And this hypeman doesn't really want to build you up, it primarily wants you to go apeshit, and if you let him talk, he'll find something wrong in anything and everything, and how it's fucking YOU over specifically. You already kind of saw it, when you did your post. There is this huge mental body in your head, tearing women apart at every level, and somewhere deep down there, there is a quiet, little voice saying "...but-". That's your actual self. Your rational self. You have to realize, the hypeman knows what feels good, that's why you let him get so close to you, for all the wrongs you had to suffer in this world, he is the resistance, the spite in the darkest of hours, the unapologetic, indomitable spark of justice that shits fury over all your enemies. It pretends to soothe your wounds by tapping into your pain and feeding it into your anger. E.g. "That woman that left you and took half your money? You have done nothing to deserve that. You did everything perfectly. She ruined the perfect relationship. She is a WHORE. Don't expect a woman to EVER be loyal to you. EVERY woman is like this. And they are ALL out to screw YOU over." That may be a loop that you are finding yourself in currently. And the more you focus on it, the stronger you make it. You're quite literally at the point, where you are starting to delude yourself into thinking, that you don't actually want love, because your hypeman is this much in your head feeding you all this shit to make you feel good, and the more desperation you feel, the more intense the inner dialogue is going to get. And it's not going to get you anywhere. The hypeman is not interested in actual solutions. It wants to keep the conflict within you going, so he can step in and shine and tell you all that you want to hear, whilst you are more and more letting your control slip out of your hands. Remember that quiet voice within you underneath all that ecstatic mental body that gives you a wholesome feeling, the *disturbance* within your hegemony of loathing. This is the voice, that wants a resolution, and unlike the hypeman, it'll tell you all the things you never wanted to hear. Things, that turn the entire lively construct from which you fed yourself the negativity that gave you relief, into weak, crumbling stone first and then blows it apart. Instead of making peace by continuously feeding yourself new information why X is inferior/worthless/despicable, you will have peace by default. It'll take quite a leap completely change the way you thought about everything. Take it on slowly, focus on that quiet voice, and let it poke holes into the stories the hypeman is saying. Let it show you, what is actually true. That's a huge ass text. But I hope I could help you with a thing or two.
  14. This is not the definition of empath. This is a symptom of a core issue.
  15. Bernard Bujard

    Sacred Snow

    Amazing! Thank-you BeyondTheRim. I looked at all of the links. The macrophotography and computer animations are amazing. I've always been fascinated with the science of snowflakes. What many images don't reveal is that snowflakes and Sacred Geometry can be both 2-D and 3-D.
  16. stace

    Sacred Snow

    http://mkwc.ifa.hawaii.edu/current/cams/index.cgi?mode=single hey Teal! heres the link for the Mauna Kea road conditions / web cam etc. Since you ARE in the Islands ( Maui eh?). * “no worries to hop ova to Kona for trip up mauka eh?” * my attempt to speak pigeon :] it’s be while since I lived Kona side....wish I was @ CURVEBALL. Soon. 🤙🏻, stace 👽🏄‍♀️👩
  17. stace

    Revenge & Forgiveness

    Good Morning! WELL done Ladies! Not only is the chemistry between you and Dr. Laura balanced , the cohesive vibration you and she CREATE allows that sort of comfortable energy to flow INTO and through the listening and viewing experience. Thank you so much! I felt as if my own personal “Santa” was handing me the gift of a “Merry Christmas”! 🌻🐚☘️ 💚, stace (👽😻🧜‍♀️) [ still following the brilliance :] o, something thing to note .... ....Teal, please do a little research on the phrase “ rule of thumb”. 🙏
  18. Hi Laurendyane, If I can offer my view on your situation than, first of all, you are definitely not alone. You are one of us and I think the intensity of all the emotions you have right now is there because you have been brave enough to actually look at them and acknowledge that they exist, that something has been done to you and you are not okay with that. Most people never dare to even get close to such a realization. And that is definitely your power to see and feel inside of yourself, to be present and to take all that information into account while creating a more beneficial outcome for yourself. Emotions when stirred up can be really messy but they do contain a lot of valuable information to help you get your power back even more. For example, you mention that “my partner loves me under conditions, rejects me, my needs, everything I say or do is wrong”. The behavior that you perceive, the way it makes you feel – it teaches you a lot about how you want to be treated, it helps you become super clear on what your needs actually are, and once you know that for yourself it’s time to take action towards creating such reality. I think the danger with anger is the blame game we tend to play – you did this to me, it’s your fault, and then you remain in that space of powerlessness where others can treat you the way they please. But it should be about you accepting and respecting yourself and your needs which in turn translates into decisions you make to actually enforce those inner concepts you now hold true for yourself. I hope this helps a little. You're a truly brave soul. Hugs to you.
  19. I can share what expansion means to me. Simply put, it’s like uncovering more and more levels of consciousness to be explored and it’s a never-ending process, for new questions, new conflicts arise with each progressive level and when you have gathered enough resources to solve the existing ones you have also created enough of new ones to be solved during the next cycle. It’s much like the learning curve – you start learning something new and the first knowledge you get is that of how much you actually don’t know, i.e. you become aware of it, and this awareness drives your further effort to actually learn, to fill the gap between not knowing and knowing. And then you find another gap, and another one and so on. I think the discomfort of knowing what you don’t know or don’t have is precisely the thing that keeps expansion in motion. If you would have everything you ever needed what's the point of doing anything? What's the point of existing?
  20. I still eat red meat but I noticed a change in the way my body reacted to food and coffee in general. I have to eat light to feel good. I love fish and all that comes from the sea. I also can eat pizzas and hambs but it makes me feel bad afterwards (guilt and fear of gaining weight). I have to say I am glad humans also invented vegan clothes and accessories. Vegan "leather" is great for not only it is 100per cent animal suffering free but it also tolerates the rain quite better than true leather. (Recently I saw a girl vent on how "pathetic" the vegan fashion was to her and she even was stupid enough to complain about the very one vegan handbag she had bought...just because she thought true leather was cooler than vegan leather. Uh.) ❤️ Deneb
  21. (edit: just want to stress the danger of labels @people:don't identify with the labels they may have given you, you are not a thing nor a disease!) Oh, the problem with what they call "bpd" is that yes, you lack borders BUT you are highly sensitive at the same time and your worst fear is... abandonment:/ They invented the word "borderline" to try and describe a state that can't be classified as "madness" yet can't be labelled as "normally funtioning" in terms of...coping with one's emotions. Yes, the core of it all is a huge trauma of abuse and/or neglect in early childhood. Things got so bad with term "bpd" and the way it is confused with "psychopathic personality" (the one who really can't care) even leads some doctors to refuse to work with these patients because they are afraid the therapy may become detrimental to them docs. No kidding Pastor! Isn't this sad? The main issue when you "have bpd" is regulating your emotions. Since the serious traumas that caused it happened at an age where the baby/child could not distinguish itself between what is his/hers and what belongs to their parents. Everything loss and separation related can trigger a bpd person into... pushing the reset button. The shifting of moods is also quite different from what they call bipolar: a bipolar holds his mood for days while a typical "bpd" can shift mood ...in minutes (before the healing journey starting) . From tantrum to despair, from mysterious silence to non stop crying, self harm, risky behavior... They tend to seek fusion in relationships and since the fear of loss/abandonment is so deeply rooted (oh God help me on that one) they often are the ones to "break up"relationships. I refuse to identify too much with that painful condition simply because... I want and need ways out of my pain and labels of this kind are quite harmful. I hope this helps you understand better what "bpd" feels like Pastor. love and cheers, Deneb PS: Teal DOES hate labels of the mental health as much as I do. I am sick and tired of trashers using this "borderline" word to describe her as some kind of sick and highly mentally disturbed fucked up guru. This also hurts me. People used to blame demons for everything, now bpd is supposedly the new plague. UH! Labels are a plague! Remember the expression "he/she called me names", this one should become "he/she gaved me labels and labels only" 🐱❤️
  22. I have been vegan for over 3 years and before that I was a vegetarian for many years. I have not had any health problems and I feel great! As a matter of fact, my bad cholesterol levels greatly decreased so much my doctor was actually shocked and could not believe it. Just make sure you eat the rainbow and eat a lot so you're not hungry! Good luck!
  23. Imagine I am a deer grazing in a field. NEEDING another member of the herd to behave in a specific way in order for me to feel safe is radically different than having the DESIRE to feel safe fulfilled. In one of these scenarios the entire herd is free and in the other, one deer has to bulldoze itself constantly in order to meet my NEEDS. Little did I know...the simple act of revealing what I WANT to the entire herd enables them all to receive inspiration on how and when to provide for me in far better ways than I could conceive alone. Long story short...if we can allow our NEEDS to reveal the underlying EXPERIENTIAL DESIRE, this will manifest in far more expansive ways than creating oppressive codependent relationships where we are continually let down, disappointed and breeding resentment...but it takes courage to be able to validate and reveal what it is we truly WANT rather than attaching to WHO and HOW it is provided. Codependent relationships established to meet our NEED to belong will end up magnifying the part of us that feels like we don't belong anywhere...so we will have to look at it eventually one way or the other. For some of us it is totally worthwhile establishing codependent relationships in order to feel safe and for others it isn't...but but acting like they aren't codependent just because they are beneficial feels like resistance to me. I personally think it's an illusion that one perspective invalidates the other...all that matters is what we want...and if we are in a space where we are unable to acknowledge our desires and vulnerabilities...let alone express them..codependency is our only choice as it is impossible to ignite the divine masculine (providing) energy of the universe otherwise...and that's totally Ok!
  24. staz

    Hay Fever

    maybe we are rejecting what pollen represents.. reproduction maybe... first thing that popped into my head also stopping dairy has benefited me greatly with the symptoms
  25. Borderline personality disorder seems to be a serious lack of borders leading to interfering with others, difficulty with social interactions and assuming it's everyone else's problem. Does this result from living with parents who lived vicariously through their children?
  26. Deneb, Thank you so much for taking the time to read and for your advice. I am so grateful. I agree I have many toxic relationships in my life right now and I do believe my daughter is simply mirroring my pain back to me. I struggle with letting go. I love the people in my life deeply and unconditionally (even if the love is not returned) and I think I have been hoping that if my vibration shifts, their behaviour towards me will shift too. But it could be that if I move away from then I would no longer feel such intense pain. There are a lot of what ifs for me. I have been with my partner for 7 years and we have been on and off throughout. My heart always pulls me back to him and I cannot ever move on without him and he has the same problem without me. It's so hard to know what to do when all of my being is drawn to him but yet I am struggling and in pain in relationship with him and also without him because my heart aches for him when we separate. I feel like there's a lesson I'm not learning here. I do believe that he is my twin flame. You are right in saying he has very deep issues within himself also. You are right that the pain is calling out to be seen. The thoughts I have, have scared me enough to look at my pain and start my healing journey. Coming to this forum and reaching out (and your replies) have helped me feel less alone. I am the only one in my family or friends that is"spiritual" and it is very lonely sometimes to hold all my thoughts and feelings inside. This in itself was a big step forward for me. Thank you again Deneb for holding a space for me to share.
  27. Hi Teal! Do you know Higher Self Reading as thought by Marit Reitan in Oslo, Norway? I think If would be so cool for you two to team up and work together to help people actually do energetic work more through their Own intuition. I think you would still have a line of work, even if people were to be empowered to do more of it themselves💪🏼😅 She has very concrete techniques of accessing one’s own higher selves/soul. Also a tip is to combine it with Parts Psycology - as well as your own Parts Work. In Part Psycology the main goal is to make all the different parts play together in a metaphorically speaking -> big orchestra - where the concious mind is the conductor, leading which part that is to play louder and softer. (Very similar to your Parts Work, but still it’s different in some nuances.) Also I would love to work together on projects in the future - I think that would benefit the both of us! 😊🙏🏼 Hugs from Norway!
  28. HEY! Now we have the realer you! The one who took the decision not to believe in love anymore...not to be hurt anymore. Only pleasure, without the suffering. It is a human reaction dear! You opened about both the reaction...and your very own belief about love. Once you gain awareness this is only a belief , next step is... Does that belief make you feel happy or miserable? Does gravity always has to be or be 1G? Do people need papers and progeny to really love each other? My guess is you are allergic (not only to your pain) to all things being manipulated and labeled as "love" by our current human society and wanna know what? This is rather a sign of a healthy and open mind. Also Garnet and I weren't very tender with you to say the least but you reacted by peeling out the most painful layer of your ego right in the eye of a public forum. This takes balls to me and is a sign of "malehood" : being wishing to admit one's frail. You have my respect for doing so. Just to quote Trent Reznor: "I am strong enough to admit...my very own frail, too." I as a woman... adore this. So, you decided to put a condom on your heart not to suffer anymore. It is a choice but... of course deep down there you suffocate dear! Where you see a lost cause I now see much hope for you. I do. take care outhere, Deneb
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