Marissa64

To heal others

What do I really want for myself at this point in my life and why do I want that? I want certainty at this point in my life. because of the stage I am in life right now, I am at a point where I have to make a lot of big decision. And these decision have no finite or clear results. I’m filled with uncertainty and fear. There is always one obvious better choice but I am always urging for the other. I want certainty about me, I want to align, I want to know myself. Even if I am scare, at least I can be certain about me. I want this because it gives me comfort, it feels better, less trembling soul, less intimidating. I am scare of too many things and so at-least certainty about myself will direct me to the best choice for me, a decision that I’m more satisfied with even in fear. Now writing this, I can look at me from a future and done me perspective. She arise. I’m looking at her and I see the case that I had made a decision that didn’t turn out like what I intended. I was asked, do I regret it? No, I softly and groundedly reply. I don’t feel the regret at all. It’s not here. If you had the chance again, would you do differently? No. I can sense a sense of no regrets from the “everything that I had done made me who I am today.””I wouldn’t do anything differently, I was proud that she decide to follow her alignment instead of the other ways.” “I was just glad she listened to herself” “the ways it works, you can’t go wrong. Everything will grow out of it, expanding of direction and opportunities. It’ll grow out of it, it only matter which direction she decides for it to grow. That was her choice. It’ll grow either way. It only matter, did her choice chose to betray herself or was it wholeheartedly align within herself.” “ it is a choice of direction for expansion”. I see. You seem so wise and know it all. It’s so calm. “Life is not turbulent like you think.” “It’s more like a dance, that you have fun with in the ups and down, all of it is for you to have fun with it, it’s all gonna be ok, it was just a dance I went through. You can have fun with the most intense part, you can dance real passionate, or sometimes you needs to slow dance my dear. All of it is a slow dance, it’s not that hard if you dance, to dance you must feel the rhythm and you flow with the rhythm, that’s how you dance beautiFully” “ a dance is only chaotic when you don’t feel the rhythm my dear” “when you wholeheartedly have the choice to feel the rhythm and entirely have the ability to feel and follow with it” “life is a dance, even in you day-to-day life, if you listen, you’ll hear the rhythm and so you dance with it, if needed give it intensity, if the beats move slow then follow the beats, it tells you what to do, so you don’t needs to be that lost, it tells you what to do” “dance honey” “dance”. It seems that is a grown-er version of myself where she seems so grounded, and sure in herself , and she was telling me what to do. I can feel her sureness and unquestionedness. She is centered and listen vibrationally. She’s more mature than me, she’s attuned. I’ve written exactly every words she wanted to say. I can feel the restrained and tension every time I delete a few words or try to rephrase it or fix it grammatically. She didn’t like it when I didn’t present as exact to what she was saying. I feel myself probably will return to do more alignment work, I feel like my current self want to borrow her sureness to feel comfort. But she’s probably gonna get pissed if I keep going to her but never takes any of the knowing into action. That I’m still betraying myself the whole time and then I go to her for comfort.