Sending my child to school even tho he hates it and I hate it when I just want to be a non-schooling mother where we explore the world instead and learn through play and real life; staying in the house I rent because I can’t find a way to just up and leave and live the life I long for; doing my uni work even tho I’ve no idea what the end goal is; smiling at others when I’m broken inside…
That all my problems have been created by me in order to keep me safe or look for a saviour, because I’ve never felt safe. And until I step fully into my unsafety, and allow myself to be completely who I am in raw, I will never be safe. But I’m too scared to do it alone. I want to save myself and others, but by saving myself, I think I’ll make myself and others unsafe. It’s futile.
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