(hahaha...*warning....this i do write essay long replies*....i guess i use this as my Q&A journal since i have been doing it for a while in real time)

What makes me feel great about myself?

Hmm,...my initial thought was....i don't know. I have to think about it.

...i'm thinking...

..hmm,..does anything make me feel great about myself... fuk...if i don't have an answer for this that is sad. Surely there must be something Katy. Have a longer deeper think....

Well i think because i don't feel great about myself that is an initial hindrance to the question.

..Have i ever felt great about myself?.. well i guess, yes. When i used to dance. More specifically when i had a routine nailed down and it was one i enjoyed that i could express alot of emotion in. When i knew/felt like i was doing well and had an audience or people watching ho could appreciate my expression.

In my adult life when have ever felt great about myself..apart from that? "Great about myself". That's a pretty specific phrase. There have been fleeting moments e.g. getting accepted after an audition into a course (which turned out to be hell). But other things of celebration have not been fully really for my sake. Yes i passed my driving test recently (late learner)...but it felt good, not great.. as it wasn't the motivation from myself but pressure from family. ffs.

Ahh jessus, seriously,....that's sad man, how can i not think of any other time "I have felt great about myself". Jeez....i think i need to work on self-esteem more than i realised. But also like....how can you feel great without achieving something. I mean would that not, for myself i feel like, have to come from achievement. ..? Hmm... i guess no actually it doesn't have too. I guess feeling great about oneself doesn't need to be conditional to 'achieving' something.

I mean the question "When do you feel great?" is different and maybe a bit easier to answer than "When do you feel great about oneself?"...

I am trying to think when the last time i genuinely felt this way was.

Oh wait i remember the last time- it was 2018!...................4 years ago............hmm....Katy...that makes me sad....i don't want you to go so long between spells of feeling great about yourself.....I am sorry you feel that way>not necessarily bad- but just never better than ok...Just a middle ground. Hm,, i guess that is much better than the majority of 13-28 when alot of that time- certainly not all- was self hating, self destructive.

Yes so i was saying, 2018. I took part in a fun Charity race with the Ladies from work. I loved it, the endorphins got flowing and i enjoy physicality,..or maybe used too enjoy it more before i started feeling pain in my body- my knees. But yea, such a high from that, and also i kept a good pace. Myself and a colleague broke of from the rest of the group who were taking it easy (all abilities could take part), and we ran together supporting each other in going forward. And i enjoyed supporting her, especially towards the end i was like someone you can do it!, we can do it!, we are nearly there! And then i said come on, and took her hand as we crossed the finish line together! (which for me is funny as i am competitive person, but we felt more like a team than two single people running with each other). Was such a good day. Felt great after the accomplishment. Keeping pace, only slowing to a walk once for a short time on an incline, to supporting each other to keep going, the high from the endorphins, the fresh air, pushing through the struggle of the body being pushed to its limits. And haha being the first two back from our workplace haha,..by quite a wee bit. #stillloveabitofcompetitionespeciallywheniamonthewiningedge ahha .

Okay well, i'll leave it there.

Except,..maybe i can think of what's one step i can take to help me "feel great about myself" going forward. Hm....hahah i was going to say more regular showers hahaha....

But i think i know what i need to do. Find one thing, any physical activity that i ENJOY and does not at this point harm my body e.g. injurious/hard on the knees and do it once a week. Hmm, i am already feeling resistance to this,...and now fear....because of past health things.....Hmm,,,, okay lets aim to start once a month i think Katy can help you to work on feeling good in your body and take it from there if you want to build on it. Which very highly likely as soon as i return to any form of fitness after a very long hiatus i will feel very strongly...(as a secondary- to spend money wilfully on a physio to assess things so can go forward with much more ease also).

But superseding all of the above in the last paragraph is i need to get out of here. I need to make sacrifices temporarily for the next few months to get out of this flat. Where you live can have a massive impact on your life. I find it difficult to make sacrifices especially when it comes to food choices etc. for financial reasons but, BUT Katy> it doesn't mean you need to eat cheap junk. There are ways around it, and you know that.

We are close> next month there will hopefully by then be enough to drop a deposit, first month, moving company. If i commit to the sacrifices. Short term pain long term gain..

On 5/29/2021 at 10:41 PM, Anjali said:

When I have a real good talk with people on deep emotional stuff & when I feel accepted by them.

Oh yes! Indeed, i love finding people whom you can both talk about deep stuff together with and neither of you are phased (scared,put off,over dramatic) by speaking the truth of feelings

On 6/8/2021 at 10:26 PM, Lesa Spravka said:

Dancing 

When I’m funny. 

 

 

Yes, that's true for myself actually. I love when i am able to bring people to laughter and fun  Harmless pranks and roleplay haha

On 12/25/2021 at 7:49 AM, Tadd Yamamoto said:

1.  Accomplishing a really difficult task

2. Giving advice that helps someone feel better

3. Singing and listening to music

4. Being present with my emotions

5. Expressing my opinions about something

Yes! Singing. Love singing and rapping,..but i feel unable to do so living in a building with paperthin walls atm.

I don't know, nothing really makes me feel great about myself. But I thought of this: I've done many things wrong (or could've done them better) but the way I gave birth was kind of well done, "intuitively". (and also how I wanted it to go) and I can't be mad about myself on this, because I did a kinda good job. 

Singing from the heart, the words that bring forth the emotions of unconditional true love, I suppose 

My creativity 

Not a damn thing

I am so unstoppable when it comes to my curiosity and thirst for a quality life. I just naturally never settle for a “mediocre.”

I love doing new stuff. I’m full with business ideas.

I feel so good within my body when I am singing from my heart

I love that I value free will and freedom.

I am talented in various things like singing, drawing, writing songs, writing, collecting knowledge and wisdom, fast in learning…

I also love myself when I stand up for my true feelings, emotions, and integrity.

I feel good about myself when I am just having fun, relaxing, and being around people who love me and relax me. 

My mind and my smile!