The hardest part about my job is that I am teaching largely to an audience that still desires conformity. What I mean by this is, everyone wants THE answer that EVERYONE can agree on. We want conformity because we want validation. Having a group of people unanimously agree on our perspective, reassures us and validates our perspective. That gives us a sense of security. The problem is, there is no way to reach conformity and conformity is not the purpose of life, far from it. It actually impedes expansion in many ways. We will not all agree and we will not all find conformity as long as we hold different vibrations. And people do hold different vibrations. This means that what resonates with one person will not resonate with another. What feels like an improvement to one person will feel like a setback to another.
Today, I released a video called “Want to Be Happy? Give Up on Happiness!”. It is a video designed for people who are in a space of powerlessness about happiness. It is designed for people who feel like happiness is beyond their reach. These are people who have developed immense resistance to their unhappiness because they desperately want happiness, but can’t seem to achieve it. For people in this particular vibration, the idea of giving up on happiness or letting go of it feels like relief because doing so is a vibrational improvement upon the powerlessness of chasing something they don’t think they can attain. To people who feel as if happiness is attainable and who are in a more empowered state about happiness, the idea of giving up on happiness or letting go of it, feels like stress because for them, doing so is a vibrational decrease or setback from the empowered feeling of allowing themselves to make happiness the number one prerogative of their lives. To many, this teaching of mine today will seem contradictory. After all, I’m the one that keeps saying, “Happiness is the purpose of your life” and “cut out the middlemen by going straight in the direction of happiness” and “make happiness the goal of your life”. Now here I am today telling people to “give up on happiness”. But these seemingly contradictory teachings, when viewed from a higher perspective, are not contradictory. They are in fact complimentary. They are complimentary because I am offering many different teachings that will aid people at different stages of vibrational progression.
If you have spent any time exploring the world of spirituality or self-help, you have most likely discovered that spiritual teachings and spiritual teachers themselves can be frustrating because they present such contradictory teachings. For example, the teaching of “fill your own cup” contradicts the teaching of “ask for help, this is an interdependent universe”. The teaching of “fear is harmful because it is an illusion and it is ego” contradicts the teaching of “fear is a valuable tool, it allows you to have awareness and to make self loving decisions”. The teaching of “focus positively” contradicts the teaching of “do your shadow work”. The teaching of “be in the state of allowing” contradicts the teaching of “take initiative and create your own reality”. The teaching of “you’re perfect just the way you are” contradicts the teaching of “take responsibility for your life and your own problems by committing to self improvement”. The teaching of “love your enemy and be unconditionally loving” contradicts the teaching of “separate yourself from those who contribute to your suffering and surround yourself instead with supportive people”. The teaching of “set healthy boundaries” contradicts the teaching of “there is no separation, the basic truth of this universe is oneness”. You get the point. So, which teaching is right and which teaching is wrong? The answer is both are true.
Spiritual teachings are contradictory because spiritual teachings must take into account a multi dimensional universe. The rules change on each dimension. What is true for one dimension is not necessarily true for the next. On one dimensional level, fear is illusion created for the purpose of expansion. On another dimensional level, fear is a real and valuable tool, which can teach you and keep you safe. Teachings are only valuable relative to a person’s current vibration. This means that depending on your vibration, a teaching will either cause you to vibrate lower or vibrate higher. This is especially true of the third dimension, which was created to be the most contrasting environment from source itself. Most of what we experience here, is intended to be illusion. So even the appearance of the third dimension (separation and individuality) which is very much true for the third dimension, is false for the higher dimensions of this universe, where no separation or individuality actually exists. So which is true? Both! Depends on the angle you’re looking at life from.
This contradiction in spiritual teachings can easily be highlighted through the example of “fill your own cup”. The idea behind “fill your own cup” is that if you learn how to love yourself and get happiness for yourself, then that energy will flow over to other people and you will no longer wander the earth trying to get other people to fill up your cup. Some spiritual teachers suggest that the fill up your own cup teaching is a harmful teaching because it causes people to feel alone and responsible to do everything for themselves in a universe that is actually interdependent. These same teachers also suggest that there is no “cup” (separate identity) because we are all made of the same energy. And that indeed the very thing we need is support and help from each other. Are they wrong? No. They are right. But so are the spiritual teachers that teach people to fill up their own cup. How can this be, when it seems to be such a contradiction? It is because we are teaching to people who are at a different vibrational level. The people who will resonate with the teaching of fill up your own cup, are those who are feeling powerless to other people. Other people are failing to meet their needs. On top of that, they are self less people who are self sacrificers; people for whom it was never ok to do anything for themselves. The only way they could get their cup to fill up was through the gratitude of others or through approval from others. And so, a step up vibrationally speaking, is to believe that it is ok to be selfish. That it is ok to do things that make you happy, and that instead of this meaning that you’ll be a bad person, it means that you’ll be overflowing with so much love, that it will spill out to others. To these people, the teaching of “fill up your own cup” will feel empowering.
The people, who will not resonate with the fill your own cup teaching, are those who feel overwhelmed by having to do it all alone; those who feel isolated and as if the weight of the world is on their shoulders. Those who feel guilty about getting help and love from others. And so, a step up vibrationally speaking is to believe that this is an interdependent universe, and that getting help from others is not only ok, but also essential. To these people, it will benefit them to focus on the truth that nothing separates them from others. To these people, this teaching will feel provide a sense of relief. Though these teachings seem contradictory, they are not. They are directed at people with two different vibrational set points.
The objective truth relative to this fill your cup argument is that this is an interdependent universe and so, there really is no separation between us and other people (there is no cup); but in the third dimension, we experience our individual perspectives and beings and we end up miserable if we need other people to fulfill us. They always fail at it, so it is crucial to learn how to love ourselves if we are to be happy (there is a cup).
This idea that contradictory things can both be true, is easily seen when we examine emotion. We all know that the optimal state to be in is forgiveness and love. But knowing that and expecting ourselves to be there in that state, is not going to make us miraculously feel loving or forgiving. To someone who is feeling powerless and guilty, anger will be a vibrational improvement. So, listening to angry music will feel good for them. Does that mean that it is good to listen to angry music? Yes. To someone who is feeling optimistic and in love, anger is a vibrational decrease. So, listening to angry music will feel bad to them. Does that mean that is bad to listen to angry music? Yes. So whether it is good or bad to listen to angry music, depends on where you are vibrationally.
Truth is subjective. We need to start caring less about a unanimous truth more about how things feel to us personally. If we feel relief and follow our joy, we will find whatever spiritual teaching is right for the vibration that we are currently in. Listen to the spiritual teacher that makes you feel good. That is your internal guidance system telling you that the vibration they are offering you, is an improvement on your current vibration. This is why it is so important to create your own religion just for you, made up of all the teachings that work for you personally. We need to be honest about whether or not those teachings actually do benefit us. But no one can know whether they are or are not beneficial for you. We all may have our opinions, but no one is right about you… but you.
Is it true that if we are in alignment, we will be unconditionally loving towards others? Yes. But the teaching of “be unconditionally loving” can get us into a lot of trouble if we haven’t learned how to love ourselves yet. If we don’t love ourselves, we may still be a vibrational match to people who don’t treat us well. If we try to be unconditionally loving towards them and prescribe to the teaching of oneness, then we may keep ourselves in detrimental situations to our well being. So is it true that to be self-loving, sometimes means to separate yourself from other people and stand up for yourself? Yes. We need to take into account the fact that we are all at different vibrational levels. What is downstream for one person, may be upstream for another. Some of the highest objective truths inherent in this universe, which apply to the higher dimensional levels, are literally harmful to someone who is in a particularly low vibration.
It is simply impossible to find a spiritual teacher who is able to teach one, solid, non contradictory truth that will help all people on earth. This is what everyone keeps looking for though. But you wont find it. Because this means you’d have to ignore your own internal guidance system and trust someone else. And you’d have to ignore what is right for you right now to accept what is right in general as solid unwavering truth. No good spiritual teacher is going to harm you by asking you to replace your internal knowing of what is right for you right now for his or her particular truth. The best spiritual teachers cast teachings out into the world for people from all different vibrational set points to find. Think of them like tools dropped from a plane onto a deserted island that will benefit someone from wherever they currently are vibrationally. It is up to us to allow the universe to lead us to those tools and it is up to us to know which tool or teaching feels useful to us for whatever project we currently have in mind.