• Pain and Paradise

    la_carpio.jpegCosta Rica is a country that doesn’t bother to hide its shadow.  Mansions are right next door to metal shacks where whole families live on dirt floors.  Educated professionals drive to work past people who live in a primitive state, more like animals in their behavior than people.  People selling goods on the street assault the cars when traffic slows.  I wouldn’t say that Costa Rica is integrated.  Rather the light and the shadow in this place is like a soup of flavors that do not merge.  In America, the shadow is avoidable.  It is hidden behind closed doors.  It is ostracized to ‘that part of town’.  Old people are put in old age homes.  The sick are confined to hospitals.  The only things that are displayed openly are the acceptable, the new, the valuable, the young.  It creates a kind of naivety in the average American.  You have to have been behind those closed doors to know what is actually there. 

    I must admit that even though I am someone who is so dedicated to integration, it is much less comfortable for the disintegrated shadow to be in plain view…  To not be able to escape it.  It is difficult to live in a place where pain is on open display everywhere you look.    It is not comfortable to be an American in a third world country.  It took leaving America for my various world tours to feel love for America.  It took leaving America for my various world tours to recognize any trace of American in myself.  It wasn’t until I brought myself and my entire intentional community to this third world country to live that I realized just how attached I am to certain things that are no longer available to us here.  Things like quiet and hot water and Whole Foods and being able to flush toilet paper down the toilet and import products and public protection agencies and being able to communicate with people and road maintenance and reliable electricity and connection to the rest of human civilization.      

    Zarcero-Costa-Rica.jpgFamiliarity is a serious attachment that is not to be taken lightly.  I have dated a few men in my life who come from different countries and cultures than myself.  I couldn’t relate to their discomfort until now.  I couldn’t relate to them when they said that going back ‘home’ felt like all the tension left their body and they could breathe again.  I feel myself tensing against all the things that I do not like in comparison to back home.  Like the way that as a Gringo, I may as well have a dollar sign on my forehead.  I can feel the way the locals do not relate to me as a person but more as a resource and have no moral issue charging me four times as much as they charge other people.  Or the way that drivers take the lines in the road to be a mild suggestion.  Or the way that people walk and stop their car literally in the middle of the street.  Or the stray dogs that wander everywhere.  Or the fact that every building is covered in jail bars.  Or the sexual aggression of so many of the men here.  Or the fact that it is impossible for a vegan to find anything to eat unless they grow it or make it themselves.  Or the fact that most people here are so relaxed that they operate on a time system all their own and do not seem to bothered by meeting standards of any kind. 

    I find myself struggling with the climate.  It is so hot in this tropical climate that I cannot think straight.  I was born and raised in an alpine climate at super high altitude.  My blood feels so thick here; it gives the sensation of molasses running through my veins.  I miss the snow.  I find myself dreaming about the snow. 

    449162672_640-e1400597180407.jpgIt is safe to say that homesickness has set in.  When homesickness hits you, your mind starts to isolate you from where you are and from the people there by comparing every unwanted thing about them to how it was back home.  It feels like loss.  We had so many years to find the exact things that made our heart beat and our soul settle in the place we called home.  Now, we have to do it all over again.  It takes time to find the things about where you are now that make your heart beat and your soul settle.  You have to actively look for them.  So often when I travel, I wish that we could establish another world.  A world where we take the best of every single place and culture on this earth and establish a new culture out of all of it.  Imagine taking the enterprising mentality of America and the efficiency of Germany and the chocolate of Switzerland and the language of the French and the kindness of Bhutan etc…  A world where each culture got to pick the very best of itself and give it over so it could be woven together to create a human masterpiece. 

    images (4).jpegIntegration is everything.  It is everything for this world and it is everything for us as individuals.  People live their lives in a state of dis-integration.  Most people think they are a unified singularity, but they are not.  I know that this will be a whole new chapter of my teachings in the coming years.  It already has been, but I have not addressed this issue directly with the public yet.  I have not yet drawn attention to the fragmentation that exists within people.  I have not yet exposed this as the real reason why our relationships are so impossible to maintain.  Life here at the retreat center has exposed this reality with stunning clarity.  We are in the middle of hosting a breatharian retreat.  Nothing exposes what is not integrated quite like a dry fast.  Like shamanic medicine work and breathwork, dry fasting coughs the contents of the subconscious mind to the surface and into plain view.  It is intense.  It is so intense that it impacts everyone around it.  In perfect synchronicity, it is the dry season in Costa Rica as well.  The plants give their essence back to the sun at this time of year.  It is given back to them in May when the rains return. 

      The ocean is like bathwater at this time of year.  I went out into it this week.  I could have spent the entire day in it.  Watching the clouds glide over the surface of the water like a lover touching its skin.  Feeling the mild thrill of deciding whether to go up over or dive under the oncoming waves.  The salt dried itself on my skin.  Eventually, I noticed that I was literally glittering in the sunlight.  I drank coconut water out of a green coconut with a straw.  It is a marvel to me how pain can exist in such close proximity to paradise on this planet called Earth. 

    philia t.jpg      




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    "A world where we take the best of every single place and culture on this earth and establish a new culture out of all of it" ... Teal, I know this place, it is called Canada, and it is wonderful. Our food, fashion, sport, and politics are all borrowed from other cultures. We are not without issue, that is for sure, but our compassion is strong. Maybe a 2nd home for you and yours? It will be a strong contender  as a leader for the first steps in our New Earth.❤❤❤

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    The shadow of America truly is behind closed doors, I work at a company that sends me to look after special needs children in their home. Most of the clients are wealthy and they often hire me to watch of the child while the other family members go out on a saturday afternoon while the child is left with me. it is sad but also necessary these parents are exhausted. Totally get it  Teal. 

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    Teal, I love all your Blogs and love your work and even I have more than twice your age, you are the person I have learned the most from, you have shown me how the things seem to work in this our Universe. Thank you for that! I live since over 50 years in El Salvador, my wife is from El Salvador. I am German and so I am also European. You were born in the USA, so you are an US Citizen and an American as you were born on the continent called America. But there are 21 other sovereign nations on the continent called "America" and so people born in Mexico, El Salvador, Costa Rica, Colombia, Peru, they are all "Americans", not just the ones born in the USA. I am well aware that it has become custom all over the world to call "US Citizens" "Americans", but that is not correct and we all should respect the national pride of all people born on the continent called America. I know the USA quite well and have many friends that are US Citizen, my wife studied there, my daughter and her husband studied there, my eldest grandson was born in N.Y. and has therefor an US Passport and is studying in the US. If one can hear a question in the US again and again it is "...why do they hate us so much..?" One reason could be the lack of sensibility against the pride of other nations around the world, especially the Latin American countries.

    Teal, I do hope very much you will not take my above slight critic remark in a way it is not meant as if there is one person I respect than it is you and exactly therefor I have made it!

     

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    Source judges not, the path you took was meant for you. When we are confronted with fears, we all have to make a choice. Deal with it and practice our thoughts, stay in a box of beliefs or release them? Fight or flight?

    Whatever we decide, Source does want to let you know that you are loved and seen. And asks all of the Ancient Masters reading this to awaken again and look at your 'sense of Self'. Why do we keep seeking validation from the rest of the World? 

    And so the puzzle continues...

    love & peace

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    Teal just described most Latin American countries. I myself , many times, wish I could blend the best of all worlds in one. I started with my own family. I try to learn from the best features each member of my family has. In the future , I like to go backs to spain, but I would like to be able to live in a nice home, like the one I have here. That's the hard part. 

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    Teal you Gem

    I wish i could be a fly on the wall, with you coming from a first world country to a third world and being extra sensory x10 (predator level ) My lord !!
    Would pay 4 times as much to see your facial expressions. ;)
    Decided to go dry fasting for 20 days at the end of March.
    I can already feel things coming up to the surface just by reducing my food consumption so my fast ain't to much of a shock to the system.
    You must swing past Cape Town, South Africa sometime. Would love to meet you both.

    Tooodalooo

    \m/

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    5 hours ago, Joan said:

    Teal, I know this place, it is called Canada, and it is wonderful.

    Hi Everyone, yes I agree, it would be worth it to see every facial expression of Teal's.
    As for Canada, forget it! You're way too close to USA and to those guests at our B&B in the 'village' (English expression) of Havelock North, in sunny Hawkes Bay New Zealand, I tell them - "The only real thing wrong with Canada is that you have America on your border."
    In the coming maelstrom you will see what impact that has.
    And the Canadians who are quick at riposte, usually reply that the main thing wrong with Canada is all the trees... 

    Folks - try searching online for the Crystal Castle and Shambala Gardens in Australia www.crystalcastle.com.au. They have a community there that would suit a larger Teal Tribe Community.
    Other than that, New Zealand is the place to retreat to. We have all those populations from around the world, have wonderful climates and you're 100 kms from the beach no matter what part of NZ you live in. We voted first for emancipation, are not totally dependant on China like you guys, can grow any vegetable and fruit known to man, and enjoy a Head of Government who is honest, not a loudmouth and has good business sense.

    So good luck over there! 
    And for anyone who thinks a President of USA should Tweet... you all voted for him. 

    crystal Rob 

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    Once there was a grey whale with sea-sickness, looking for a less current busi-ness, but he soon ended his next position as expert guide for Loch-Ness , after putting up a rather fishy sign ;

    If you meet our sea-pets you would feel great , but they may get great-ful ...

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    Hey Teal,

     

    thanks for the blog. Just wanted to share some thoughts and gut instincts. I used to live in Thailand and I actually felt less suffering there than I do in the Western world. In the western world I'm intrinsically bombarded with people's suffering because of their reluctance to show it. I have found that in contrast- people of developing countries are more at ease with their circumstance compared to their 'everything is not enough' counterparts. People are generally happier in themselves and yes, they do scam foreigners- you are not alone, but it is a small inconvenience in the abundance it is to experience such a different culture. I am willing to admit I loved living like a queen in Thailand and I was wary for myself when I started to adopt some entitlement status. I think living in  an entirely different culture challenges everyone. You are talking about integration in others but first, you need to start with yourself. At this  point in time you are not in a position to speak of a new world when you cannot appreciate your current. On an energy level, appreciating German efficiency and Swiss chocolate  is rather reflective of you right now. Those are incredibly egotistical things. I'm sorry to say you sound spoilt and an ego maniac. 

    I think you need to be told. 

    You have taught us well in recognising the difference.

    Take some time out.

    Edited by Karenfromtheblock
    More articulate
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    Interesting, too, that the Nicoya Peninsula is one of the world's few blue zones. Have you ventured to Territorio de Zaguetes? ...thank you for sharing your heart and mind <3

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    Almost all of this post made me cringe... I didn't realize until reading this what a privileged lifestyle you were used to leading, Teal. The lack of vegan options?! Really?! I've traveled far and wide in Latin America (by the way, this is also "America), and found your description: "people who live in a primitive state, more like animals in their behavior than people," disgusting. Would you ever say the same if you strolled through a ghetto in the Bronx? What made it ok to pass judgment on a culture you know nothing about, and one whose language - both soul and otherwise - you clearly don't speak?

    Perhaps you took your authenticity too far this time. Think twice. Lots of people read your blog. You sound like an uncultured fool here, and that's coming from someone who has loved your work for some time. Some dialogues are best kept between our mind and the Creator's.

    You are a guest in Costa Rica, essentially exploiting the country's resources, labor, and wealth for your personal gain and message. Perhaps you're missing theirs - humble yourself. You are not that special.

    It must be painful to live with such a burdensome ego. Sorry it took traveling down South to realize that. Life dismantles all of us back to zero.

    Take care & may Costa Rica bless your inner life, and your work. Integration into your idea of the ideal world... is not integration at all.

    -2

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    19 hours ago, Ex1 said:

    Almost all of this post made me cringe... I didn't realize until reading this what a privileged lifestyle you were used to leading, Teal. The lack of vegan options?! Really?! I've traveled far and wide in Latin America (by the way, this is also "America), and found your description: "people who live in a primitive state, more like animals in their behavior than people," disgusting. Would you ever say the same if you strolled through a ghetto in the Bronx? What made it ok to pass judgment on a culture you know nothing about, and one whose language - both soul and otherwise - you clearly don't speak?

    Perhaps you took your authenticity too far this time. Think twice. Lots of people read your blog. You sound like an uncultured fool here, and that's coming from someone who has loved your work for some time. Some dialogues are best kept between our mind and the Creator's.

    You are a guest in Costa Rica, essentially exploiting the country's resources, labor, and wealth for your personal gain and message. Perhaps you're missing theirs - humble yourself. You are not that special.

    It must be painful to live with such a burdensome ego. Sorry it took traveling down South to realize that. Life dismantles all of us back to zero.

    Take care & may Costa Rica bless your inner life, and your work. Integration into your idea of the ideal world... is not integration at all.

    Well there you go suggesting that Teal should get back in the box you like her to be in. What Teal is is authentic and I love that she expresses her mood honestly. The question you have to answer is - can you still respect her even in her honest imperfections? It is perfectly fine to point out what she said that offends but it is shallow to then unleash a whole garbage bag of judgment based on it. Her mood will shift again and again and not even she will always understand. It is just the box you seem to be placing her in that offends me - so I wanted you to know. 

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    1 hour ago, cowboyiam said:

    It is just the box you seem to be placing her in that offends me - so I wanted you to know. 

    "Educated professionals drive to work past people who live in a primitive state, more like animals in their behavior than people."

    "as a Gringo, I may as well have a dollar sign on my forehead."

    "locals do not relate to me as a person but more as a resource and have no moral issue charging me four times as much as they charge other people."

    "it is impossible for a vegan to find anything to eat unless they grow it or make it themselves."

    "most people here are so relaxed that they operate on a time system all their own and do not seem to bothered by meeting standards of any kind."

    "Integration is everything...  People live their lives in a state of dis-integration.  Most people think they are a unified singularity, but they are not.  I know that this will be a whole new chapter of my teachings in the coming years."

    "It already has been, but I have not addressed this issue directly with the public yet.  I have not yet drawn attention to the fragmentation that exists within people.  I have not yet exposed this as the real reason why our relationships are so impossible to maintain. "

    ...

    I'm sorry you were offended.

    I was also offended, as I'm sure many were and will be.

     

     

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    On 26 March 2017 at 11:13 AM, Ex1 said:

    "Educated professionals drive to work past people who live in a primitive state, more like animals in their behavior than people."

    "as a Gringo, I may as well have a dollar sign on my forehead."

    "locals do not relate to me as a person but more as a resource and have no moral issue charging me four times as much as they charge other people."

    "it is impossible for a vegan to find anything to eat unless they grow it or make it themselves."

    "most people here are so relaxed that they operate on a time system all their own and do not seem to bothered by meeting standards of any kind."

    "Integration is everything...  People live their lives in a state of dis-integration.  Most people think they are a unified singularity, but they are not.  I know that this will be a whole new chapter of my teachings in the coming years."

    "It already has been, but I have not addressed this issue directly with the public yet.  I have not yet drawn attention to the fragmentation that exists within people.  I have not yet exposed this as the real reason why our relationships are so impossible to maintain. "

    ...

    I'm sorry you were offended.

    I was also offended, as I'm sure many were and will be.

     

     

    I think you @Ex1 and @cowboyiam are both right in assessment but are both pulling at the same bone from different ends.

    For anyone who loves Teal's catalytic approach (getting people to actually feel and actually explain their emotions like this Blog and Comments); then re-read the explanatory pages to Teal's Completion Process book, then re-read both Ex1's and cowboyiam's comments. We are getting there people. Teal wants us to open up and this is a great example of it. Dialogue and Understanding come from focus which may lead to Awareness. 
    I too have been down back alleys and seen beggars on the streets and the only difference between them and Teal is the power of her brain and determination. (Also remember that we are born into 3D reality to experience expansion. The choice of where in the world and the parents we choose is already decided. The idea being to see what we can do with what we have from where we are...
    While I believe by comparison I am privileged, Teal was not from a privileged upbringing - but the main point @Karenfromtheblock is that she was a product of her environment like we all are. What's your reflection that has been triggered? Teal's life could have taken a dramatically different course and she may not have turned out to be the Illuminary she has become if she had succumbed to her environment. Read her Darkenss Before Dawn book. She has seen herself as a drug addict, cutter and a hopeless case. Saw herself on the street but she chose otherwise (thank you!). And we can all make the same choice and be as brave as Teal but for most of us we are not at that level of bravery because things have been far too cushy for most of us. Wait though - Donald is helping us all face this sooner than we may realise and the walls will come tumbling down. (Trump, that is, not Duck). 

    Blessing
    crystal Rob

    Edited by Crystal Rob
    spulling n further comment
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    That was a perfect description of how I felt living in Perú! Wow, I loved it. 

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