Human society the world over has values and those values are ranked. This includes what society values in men and in women. And it is absolutely a reality that the thing human society values the most in women, is physical beauty. We may not like that fact. We may think it should be different. We may argue that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. We may point to body positive marketing campaigns. You may argue that you don’t value physical beauty in a woman above other more important things. But all of this resistance is not going to get us anywhere because it is a refusal to accept that this is still the way things are. It is still a reality that in the world today, the most valued thing in a woman is physical beauty. 

What does all this mean? It means that when a woman is physically beautiful, people see value in her. She has a thing of power. She is esteemed within society. And so, people assume that she can have it all and that she is happy. Or at least she should be. All the focus and attention in society is placed on why it is so hard to be a woman who is not considered physically beautiful. That is a story that has been told over and over again. You already know that story. But you don’t know the other one. Because of this, for the sake of awareness, today I’m going to outline for you why it is so hard to be a beautiful woman.

1. Before we come into this time space reality as a physical human and we are choosing the incarnation that will serve our expansion the best, we are observing the upsides and downsides to each choice. Any single thing we choose comes with upsides and downsides. We could call this contrast. We opt into certain contrast by opting into any specific incarnation. And most people do not know that all those who opt into the incarnation of a beautiful woman, are opting into the contrast of decreasing their likelihood of ever finding a compatible mate. The reason for this is down to the fact that society values beauty so much in women, that a person (especially a man) can increase their own self-esteem and societal esteem by being with a beautiful woman. A beautiful woman is something that everyone will desire to have. But all of those people who will desire to have her, are not all compatible to her. And those who are wanting her primarily for self-esteem and societal-esteem, (which is the majority of them) will not be compatible to her. So, a beautiful woman is trying to find a needle in a haystack. The problem is, in order to get her, all of the people who want her will pretend to be that needle. And so, what beautiful women have in their hands is a recipe for relationship hell. I need you to stop for a moment here because you must remember that life is about relationships. And painful relationships, means a painful life. And this leads me to the next point.
2. Because the subconscious transaction that most partners (especially men) have with beautiful women is “I’m doing this for esteem… I’m doing this so being with you makes me feel good and better about myself and to make it so other people think highly of me”, if a beautiful woman does anything that goes against this unexpressed and un-agreed to transaction, she will find herself in conflicts. Her partner will change their mind about her being what they want. And then ultimately, she will lose the relationship. And what it takes to break this hidden transaction, is almost nothing, such as having human needs, being honest (in this case we are talking about negative feedback to her partner) and behaving or dressing in a way that isn’t seemly. A beautiful woman is an object in other people’s worlds. Like a trophy. It is very hard for a beautiful woman to find a person who wants an actual person to person relationship with her. There is a big, big difference between being lusted over and being loved.
   It is a complete misconception that beautiful women are never rejected. In fact, they are one of the most rejected groups of people on this planet. It may not look like they are being rejected when they have people lined up around the block to be with them, but look closer. No one knows who she is and isn’t. Everyone is lined up around the block because of the overlay fantasy they have about a beautiful woman and what it will give them to be with her. They are in a relationship with their pre-conceived idea of her. And she cannot live up to that idea they have. And when she doesn’t live up to it, she will be rejected. And that happens over and over and over again. 
3. As people, by the time we reach an age where we are ready to date, we have been set up by the process of socialization to be inauthentic. We spend our time trying to employ a strategy for how to get someone we want, rather than spending our time advertising who we genuinely are, so that a person who would value us can actually recognize us. And most of all, we have been set up to dupe anyone that we date. This duping pattern is a sad reality of relationships in general, no matter what people look like. If you want to learn about this pattern, you can watch two of my videos titled: What is the Dupe Pattern? And The Great Dupe of Dating.
   The duping pattern is 1,000 times worse in the lives of beautiful women. People, especially men, will go to great lengths to figure out everything they can about a beautiful woman they are interested in, so as to pretend to be exactly what she wants. So that they can attain her. And then, either quickly or slowly, they drop the façade. And the beautiful woman ends up in the opposite of what she signed up for.
4. Being a beautiful woman is an intensely isolating experience full of fragile connections. Let’s talk about insecurity in both men and women and how this leads to a beautiful woman’s isolation. People are very insecure in general, especially so when it comes to their partners. So, with beautiful women, you will see the following pattern: Male friends will be friends with her, that is until they get into a relationship with another woman. At which point, she becomes a threat to the other woman. And in order to maintain the security with the woman they are with, they will break off connection with the beautiful woman. And female friends will be friends with them, that is until they get into a relationship with another man and fear that the man will fall in love with her instead, at which point she becomes a threat to their relationship. And in order to maintain security with the man they are with, they will pull away from the relationship with the beautiful woman. It is a misconception that the most beautiful women enjoy social popularity and have lots of friends. In fact, they have very few if any actual friends who will navigate the insecurity elements that beauty brings to the table and who will commit to holding on to the relationship.       
5. Jilted lover dynamics. It is a real argument as to whether it is possible for a man to simply remain friends with a beautiful woman without falling in love with her and without developing sexual attraction to her and wanting more. And when a beautiful woman rejects a man in any way, his ego is often so wounded that he will turn against her as if she is an enemy and try to wound her back. This is also the case when a woman is actually in a relationship with a man and ends the relationship. It is more common that break ups are not amicable because of this. You’ll see all the manifestations of a jilted lover syndrome in the people around her. Yes, these dynamics can take place in a same sex relationship too. It is not emotionally safe to have a jilted lover. And often, it isn’t physically safe either.    
6. Beauty is a trigger to the egos of other people. Similar to money and fame. It activates the human ego. When the ego is triggered, it creates zero sum games, whereby it does not consider the other person’s best interests. As a result, beautiful females are taught systematically that they cannot trust others, because people so often play zero sum games with them. A beautiful woman does not have to do anything to upset other people’s self-concepts other than to exist. For example, simply existing can make other women feel bad about themselves. ALL of the negative manifestations of the human ego are amplified in those who are around a beautiful woman. Here are just some examples: Power games and struggles, jealousy, resentment, envy, defensiveness, unfriendly competition, blame, criticism, judgment, bragging, the fight for superiority, parasitic dynamics, use, projections and betrayal.
   And as if this wasn’t bad enough, people make the beautiful woman responsible to do things to calm the ego reactions of other people, for example to tone down their beauty so other woman can feel good about themselves or to not act friendly to men, so they don’t feel led on or so their partners don’t feel insecure. The ego being triggered is not a good or safe experience for anyone. The way that people’s egos are triggered by a beautiful woman makes for a very painful and dangerous life for her. If you don’t believe me, just think back to the witch trials, when men felt out of control of their own arousal near these women and as a result of it, decided they were bewitched. And as a result, these women ended up burned alive and drowned. And just because doing this is now illegal in most places, society has invented new ways, especially in the era of cancel culture, to “burn and drown” women. 
7. Society has revolted against the idea that what is valuable about a woman is beauty. While at the same time, not actually managing to change it. And so, society is a huge mixed message. But this revolt has caused a lot of pain to beautiful women because it has made them simultaneously valued and also the villains. And as if living in this mixed message were not painful enough, it has made it so that beautiful women are consistently fed with negative messaging. Messaging like society needs to show beautiful women that they are not all that important or special. Messaging like because she is beautiful, she’s crap on the inside and shouldn’t actually be desired by men. She is dumb or not nice. This is in contrast to the archetype of the fat or unattractive, but good-natured woman, who should actually be desired by men. And because so many of the body positive campaigns are being spearheaded by women who spent their life not being considered beautiful, and whom feel a high degree of pain about the women who were, so many of them have created anti-beautiful women undertones to these campaigns and movements. Just like the women’s rights movement took on anti-man undertones. They seek to rip the power away from beautiful women, as if it is beautiful women who are the bad guy in the story, who must be pulled from their pedestals. Beautiful women are also always inundated with the presumption that they are stupid. People cannot wrap their minds around the idea of a beautiful woman unpacking deep, philosophical concepts or winning a Nobel prize for physics. In the same vein, society has no interest in hearing about the pains and sorrows of beautiful women. Their sorrows attract scorn. Their pain is treated like the tears of the king. Like beautiful women are too blessed to be hurt. So, their pain is never seen, heard, felt or acknowledged. 
8. Being a beautiful woman is like living in a fish bowl or being an animal at a zoo. You attract attention, and a lot of it. This means you always have the pressure of other people’s attention any time you step out into the world. Every move you make is being watched and judged. You are under a social microscope.     
9. Because beauty is intimidating, most of the people who are willing to approach a beautiful woman are people who are not intimidated and also rescuers who wait for a beautiful woman to be in trouble to make their move. This increases the odds of a beautiful woman being approached by and getting into a relationship with a person with dangerous psychology. Such as narcissists, sociopaths and other people on the anti-social spectrum. And rescuers will wait until the beautiful woman is harmed to make their move. But they have such low self-esteem that to be secure in a relationship, they need the object of their fancy to remain “on the floor” and dysfunctional in some way. Thus, they will employ all kinds of tactics to keep the person they rescue incapacitated and in need of them. There are so many wonderful people who the beautiful woman will never meet, because they are too intimidated to strike up a relationship with her. Also, several studies have shown that people tend to move further away from a beautiful woman on the pathway or sidewalk. Creating much larger distance in common social interactions for beautiful women.   
10. People strip beautiful women of their merit. No matter how excellent they may be or how hard they may have worked to get to the level of success they have achieved, people negate this and assume that their success was handed or given to them because of how attractive they are. It is a sad reality statistically that beautiful women are less likely to be hired for high level jobs that require authority and competence. And it is also statistical that if you are more beautiful than the person of the same sex who is hiring you for a job, your chances of getting the job are abysmal.      
11. Many beautiful women never discover who they really are. Because for many of them, from day one, all the attention and emphasis is put on the way they look. They are led to believe that the only thing that matters is that. Their entire identity therefore revolves around their looks. They are never helped and directed to turn their attention inside themselves to discover who they are, their boundaries, their likes and dislikes, their other aptitudes and interests etc. Their unique character is not unwrapped, like it is in other children and teens. They are not given the grounds to develop a personality outside of the one that other people project onto them. And this leads to a feeling of emptiness and also inevitable identity and life crisis. 
12. Beautiful women are usually always the ones that are blamed when it comes to infidelity concerns. For example, if a man directs his attentions towards a beautiful woman or cheats on his partner with a beautiful woman, it is the beautiful woman who is blamed for it, as if she is the problem for having been tempting or enticing. People also blame the beautiful women for the bad things that happen to her, such as being taken advantage of sexually because of being sexually attractive, rather than the person who is the one taking advantage. Many beautiful women have been blamed for being sexually harassed and even raped and incest. As if being beautiful is the instigation. In line with this, when you are physically attractive, being friendly is almost always percieved as flirtation. 
13. Being beautiful effects the quality of your medical care. People link good looks with health. This means symptoms, pain, illness and ailments are taken less seriously when people are good looking. Medical professionals can miss a whole lot because of this bias. The medical conditions of a beautiful woman are often minimized or ignored. And it doesn’t take genius to see how much of a problem this is. This is an extreme problem when a beautiful person needs mental health or medical care for anything related to body-image issues. A beautiful woman’s body-image issues, no matter how severe, are immediately brushed off, mocked and scoffed at. They are not taken seriously and so they are not addressed. 
14. Constant sexual harassment. A beautiful woman is subject to relentless sexual harassment. Things like being touched against her will, sexual verbal commentary, sexual gestures, pressuring, their path being blocked so they can’t get away, people touching them accidentally on purpose, predatory sexual ogling, lewd jokes made at their expense, being followed, and sexual advances despite it being made clear that those advances are unwanted.       
15. Beautiful women are led to believe that the only thing people value about her, is her looks. This is painful because she doesn’t feel loved for anything else. And while this causes her pain and she wishes it were different, it simultaneously makes her desperate to maintain the only thing she was ever taught was desirable about her. So, there is a deep fear of losing her looks. This turns into a new kind of hell the older that beautiful women get. Because basing someone’s value on something that society also says goes away with age, means that a beautiful woman will be desirable for a time, and then be forgotten about and no longer valued, like an old toy a child is obsessed with and then grows tired of playing with. This leads to so much emotional pain and can lead a beautiful woman down the path of desperately trying to maintain her youth and beauty.

And while we are calling out painful realities to accept, there is definitely a scale when it comes to degrees of beauty. Why is this important? Because relative to all of these patterns, the more beautiful a woman is, the more intense these patterns get and the worse these downsides get.

Becoming aware means perceiving the full reality of things. And people are not perceiving the full reality of what it is to be a beautiful woman. The pain of beautiful women is usually completely unseen. Hence all the focus today on “pretty privilege”.  Well, what you are calling “pretty privilege” comes with a cost… a cost most people would never actually choose to pay, if they actually saw it.