Why Love Isn't Selfless, Love is Selfish. In this video I'll explain why love is selfish and not why love isn't selfless. To generalize, wherever you go in the world, in human society selflessness is a huge value. At face value, this seems like a good thing. After all, if everyone was just running around in a self-centered way doing whatever they wanted, regardless of who it negatively impacted, social wellbeing and especially social order would be hard to maintain.