One of the most confusing things to people who are aware of universal signs and synchronicities is that sometimes, when there are signs and synchronicities everywhere, following them leads you into a situation that doesn’t feel like a good thing… A situation where you’re standing there going “Wait a minute… I thought this was supposed to be a good thing, there were so many signs”. There is a bigger picture reason for this.
The universe is primarily concerned with your expansion. One of the main reasons that we can perceive time in this time-space reality is so that we can actually perceive progress. Progress and expansion is ultimately completely in alignment with your best interests. Afterall, expansion closes the gap between where you are and what you really want. But whether something is ultimately right and good for you and whether it feels right and good are sometimes two very separate things. This is why you might experience your emotional guidance system leading you to something painful instead of pleasurable. If you want to learn more about this in-depth, watch my video titled: How Your Inner Compass Leads You to Both Pleasure and Pain.
Experiences that are difficult and that hurt are not without value. We usually only see that they were necessary and see their value years later and in retrospect, once we have actually lived into the awareness of the actual necessity and actual value inherent in the experience.
So that you can understand this concept, I’ll give you an example. Liz had a childhood where she was largely ignored by both of her parents. She was in so much pain that she took to pretend as her way of mitigating her pain. She imagined that she was really a princess who was smuggled out of the castle to be raised among the commoners for her own safety, but that one day, a prince would come and rescue her away from these people and restore her to her rightful place on the throne. Because Liz used this strategy of pretend to survive her childhood, she never stopped being in this reality. It wasn’t a ‘game’ to her.
As Liz got older, she kept using this coping mechanism of pretend. She especially used it in relationships. She imagined that she could be in a relationship with any man. In truth, this is because she wasn’t really with any of the men she got into relationships with. Each man was just a person playing the part of the prince that she still had in her own head. Liz was always in a relationship. She spent no time trying to get to know who a man actually was before jumping into a relationship with him. She would idolize him and imagine him to be totally different than he actually was. She would obsess over him and obsessively seek his comfort until he didn’t match the character she had in her head. And then, he would experience a fall from grace. She would end up in a violent breakup with him and then end up with a different man the next day. She bounced from man to man like a hot potato. Liz’s psychologist told her that she had love addiction. Liz struggled with overlays as a coping mechanism in her life. To understand what overlays are in depth, you can watch my video titled: Overlay (What Prevents You from Having a Real Relationship). These overlays were ruining Liz’s life and they were holding her apart from what she really wanted.
When Liz met Jeff, she was shocked at all of the signs and synchronicities. Jeff had the same birthday as her first love in high school. Every time they met up, there were ravens nearby. At least 10 times in the first week she was entertaining the idea of being with him, she would see 11:11 and 4:44 on the clock. Her mother had always said she thought Liz should be with a man from Australia. Jeff was from Australia. Both of them shared the same favorite color. They realized that they had been backpacking through Europe at the exact same time a few years earlier. It was like the universe had always been trying to bring them together. Liz knew how to interpret those signs. This was the guy she was always meant to find… Her soul mate.
Problem is, Liz was in an overlay about Jeff. She was using her interpretation of those signs to slip even deeper into an overlay and miss every red flag about Jeff. Here are the red flags that she missed: Jeff had kids in Australia, but he lived in a different country from them. Jeff seemed to already know everything about Liz. Jeff loved breaking rules everywhere they went. Jeff was in a lawsuit when they met. Jeff would laugh when they would pass by road kill and explain it away as being so emotionally uncomfortable for him that he would just start laughing. Jeff would often lie and manipulate to get what he wanted, even in little interactions, like when they were at the grocery store and he pretended to be blind so that he could sit in a handicap only chair.
To make a long story short, Jeff was afflicted with psychopathy. Custody of his children was taken away from Jeff when he tried to kidnap them both and punish their mother by taking them to the other side of the country. Jeff had several issues with the Law in Australia. Jeff had chosen Liz as his new target. He had researched her and learned everything about her so that he could love bomb her. And once Liz committed to Jeff, he ruined her life. He separated Liz and isolated her from every other person in her life. He was so emotionally abusive, that Liz developed an eating disorder. He came up with excuses as to why she had to help him with money and eventually gained access to her financial accounts and drained them. He lacked empathy completely. And at the end of the relationship, they got into a fight and he set fire to her house, with her cat inside of it.
Liz didn’t understand why all those signs and synchronicities were pointing her towards Jeff, the man who “ruined her life”. Well… this is the reason why: From an objective perspective, Jeff was the man who, because he was so horrible, demolished Liz’s coping mechanism. Liz could no longer be in an overlay about men. It was too dangerous to not see every red flag about a person from the get go. The consequence was so high this time, he effectively broke her love addiction. Without that, Liz would not have ever snapped out of her cycle in relationships enough to actually be able to recognize red flags and assess compatibility in relationships. Consequently, she is now in a healthy relationship with a man who is compatible to her. And Liz has the ability to discern.
When signs and synchronicities pop up, it always means the universe is indicating to you that there is something important and also valuable for you inherent in the situation. Therefore, one could argue that they are leading you closer to what you want and ultimately closer to your happiness. But when you interpret those signs to mean that the universe is confirming that something will feel good, that is a big mistake. It might… it also might not. Afterall, the road to get us to what we really need can be a very dark road. And often, the road we least expect.