danastarr87

What if I would like to believe I've transcended the idea of loss traded it I to learn the art of gracefully letting go? I lost all my possessions once, fabulous french provincial furniture with a for poster canopy bed that I'd gotten from my late grandmother all of my memories souvenirs trinkets photographs yearbooks memories all my favorite clothes all the shoes I loved home decor everything from my kitchen lifetime worth of arts and crafts supplies all I got was my dog and his accessories. He's like my soulmate bff, he's definitely some type of spirit guide incarnate here on Earth just for me the way he came to me I just know he was brought here just for me and then a couple years later I ended up having to give him up my baby my heart my soul my sunshine he said of an animal shelter for 9 months and breaks my heart and gets away at my soul I miss him like crazy every day, I have reoccurring dreams that I'm looking for him and I can't find him or he's just out of reach or I'm a day late and a dollar short but I know focusing on the loss and the feeling of guilt that I have isnt going to get me anywhere obviously I feel guilty for letting him down I promised him forever no matter what the first promise I ever made that I really truly felt deep in my heart and soul. Thinking about breaking that promise gives me a wretched feeling like I'm being gutted alive and somehow I have to move on but all I can see is his face looking over his shoulder back at me

Oh no! These are profound. I know the answer for me, I also know I don't particularly like the answer, it is something I feel guilty about slightly ashamed of and honestly haven't one reason not to stop it be it good decent immoral or depraved. The remedy is simple just a little will power and taking action towards what I know will lead to my greatest joy and fulfillment. For some reason fear seems to keep getting in the way, I've dealt with fear before welcomed it in sat with it gnawing at my core and thanked it for it's presence and for alerting me to a potentially life threatening situation. But this fear isn't quite like that it's more like stage fright and apprehension. I'm certain that even the most selfish, self destructive part of me is aware that it's time we drop the crutches bc we're ready to run but I just don't know how to summon the courage

I can relate