You have R Mars and R Saturn in Scorpio so you are someone who dives fearlessly into the taboo and uncomfortable darkness with focus and maturity. I've experienced a lot of suicidal ideation and it is really unpleasant, I feel like I can provide some insight on a true solution... I have had a NDE where I crossed over and honestly I feel like death is pretty beautiful as a result of what I experienced, so I don't blame people for wanting to escape the madness and pain of life. Humanity is totally disconnected in this old paradigm from the truth of who, what, when, where, how and why they are. T