i feel internally conflicted on the sleep part. i know that i snoozed off a lot when attempting to meditate, but i can for sure say that it got me to a stage where i could relax and that was good for me as i had a lot of built up tension in my body before and anxiety. i ve also heard at times that a lot of healing is done in a sleep state so i still have it on my mind that maybe it was what i needed at the time and it still helped me. I am also slightly confused how to go about a feeling that i may be 'avoiding' but then i am actually feeling the fright of a part of me not wanting to go there, not feeling safe, not feeling ready. how does one not become avoidant if a part in them is screaming against it? i have taken myself in intense feelings kind of disregarding the vulnerable part (as i didnt know better) early on and sometimes i do not feel able to take myself full on into the emotion. i do feel i am more able to feel the emotion, in a way i am still feeling the emotion but unable to say get through a situation where this emotion is felt. maybe i am not resisting the emotion itself, but the anticipated action that would occur if the emotion wasnt there in the first place? i got to reflect a bit longer on this. But it does feel i am siding a lot with my vulnerable parts these days and not throwing them under a bus but maybe not providing other support or expansion either?