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About Nancy31xo

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  1. I can't tell you how much that conversation she had with the beautiful blonde woman who didn't feel safe around people helped me. It helped me understand myself and the women around me. Obviously beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and I am quite sure Teal understands that. But for the purpose of addressing a specific issue with this woman, Teal needed to approach it from a specific level. Of social situations, body language...the quick judgments we make about one another. On a broader level, everyone is both ugly and beautiful. But to deny that these dynamics are happening on the surface level is the opposite of healing a real problem that I experience and see in others often. This conversation wasn't about Teal, or anyone you might yourself judge as "ugly" This was about this woman and her healing process. And it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. But it seriously helped me and it was beautiful to see this woman understand herself in a new way. We all have different aspects. One aspect of me judges people on their appearance. Another aspect of me sees everyone as precious and beautiful. Which aspect needs my presence and understanding more?
  2. I just realized I went through my own pain wall during my Vipassana meditation retreat! When she said visually they look like pins and needles and razors. On day 5 it was all I could see when I closed my eyes. It was too much for me at first. It took days to get through it, and a lot of convincing myself that I wasn't abusing myself senselessly. A lot of love. I love of presence and determination. I did that for myself. That's a nice thought.
  3. Teal and Blake's relationship gives me life.
  4. I can not tell you how much this is exactly how I felt today. I said to my sister, I don't want to have to do it for myself!! I said this, talking about my own struggles with helping myself and feeling utterly alone. And I must have thought about how unsafe I was like 6 times. At the end of this rough day...it is a huge comfort to hear that I have been experiencing something along with the collective, to hear someone else say they were dealing with similar ideas.
  5. I identify with this woman in multiple ways. I have felt lost and unaware of who I was because I was playing roles for so long. I have believed that I wouldn't be liked or loved if I showed people who I really was. A "not okay-ness" about my true self. It's such a painful way to live and I'm learning that a lot of people live that way. So, I loved seeing this process and I'm grateful for such brave vulnerability. It's admirable.
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