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GabijaCij

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  1. Sitting in the bathtub today, shaving my legs, I began to think about beauty. A questioning mind always wants to know why. Why are shaved legs preferable to hairy legs on a woman? Why do people across all cultures prefer symmetry in a face? These questions fascinate me. What is beautiful today may be ugly tomorrow. And all things are replaced by a new preference; just as a new bloom one day replaces every flower. Beauty is defined as a characteristic that provides the perceptual experience of pleasure. And I think the definition says it all. If beauty is a perceptual experience an
  2. Work-family life balance is like a unicorn. People talk about this concept as if it is real. Some say they have had sightings of it and yet, it is so elusive that it remains a myth to most people. People operate under the misconception that one day it will all balance out… The job, the kids, the partner, the hobbies, the errands, the social life etc. but it doesn’t balance out and so they are left feeling like there is something they have done wrong. The truth is everyone is in this exact same boat; waiting for a miracle to balance out their lives, but that miracle never appears. You cann
  3. Last night, the noise of a crowd of excited drunk people; all of whom are in town for the Sundance Film Festival, was deafening. I found myself talking to a man who flew into town to have a business meeting with me. During the conversation, he made the observation that the reason people like me so much is because I am “self deprecating”. He was waxing poetic about the importance of humility in a spiritual leader. Since last night, I've been thinking about the topic of humility, ego and self-deprecation. People can’t seem to make their mind up about me. They either view me as humble
  4. I awoke this morning before the sun did, in tandem with the sound of birds piercing through the early hours. Everything was doused in a blanket of thick indigo colored air. I turned on the fireplace and did a salt water Neti Pot rinse. Sitting on the balcony, overlooking the incredible view, I started to think about the symbolism present in ancient cultures. It fascinates me that something can have the same basic meaning in several different cultures throughout the globe. It ties in nicely to relational psychology. Relational psychology has fascinated me for some time now. The power
  5. The air is perfumed with the scent of jasmine and wild rosemary that grows in bushes taller than your head. Today, I write this blog entry from The Ojai Valley Inn & Spa in Southern California. The view out my window is stunning. Over the bright green golf course, the mountains rise; mottled with rich, hunter green trees. In the typical Spanish villa style, the terracotta roof tops below accent the stark white walls of the extensive resort. The atmosphere here is tranquil. The guests are all on holiday and the joviality of their laughter and movements make it feel as if I have steppe
  6. I woke up this morning, after a night spent out of body watching a conflict in Iraq, with conviction. Conviction to see positive change in the world and conviction to lead that positive change. There is so much conflict in the world; and so much of that conflict happens in the name of someone’s version of God. Our search for God is nothing more than a search for the missing love within us. The existential angst we all feel is nothing more than the emptiness we feel when we have conditioned ourselves to resist the true essence of ourselves, which is love. It is because we do not feel t
  7. It is Christmas Eve. This is one of my favorite days of the entire year. I love the coziness and the anticipation that comes along with it. I love how society shuts down and everyone gathers inside their snowed in houses to eat warming, seasonal foods that they’ve looked forward to all year long. When I was growing up, I loved all of the traditions that took place at Christmas. I used to watch my father make homemade Kahlua liquor as a Christmas favor. I can still remember so clearly the sweet scent of sugar, coffee and vodka floating through the air. I also remember the sharp scen
  8. Yesterday I was forwarded an anti New Age movement video and I was asked to express my opinion on it. The basic argument made was that the New Age Movement is just opiate for the masses (what scientists have been saying about religion for years) and that it is just an excuse to boost book sales and enhance the personal careers of people like myself who are in essence convincing people they can manifest money so that we can make money off of those people. I don’t usually feel compelled to respond to videos or comments that are offered by people who are in a space of extreme resistance, becaus
  9. I did not sleep again last night. I spent the night out of body. Many of the individual clients that I kept when I transitioned to a larger, worldwide audience have been diagnosed with a terminal illness. Some of them are hospital bound and so, sometimes when I have not seen them in person for a while, I go visit them in the hospitals out of body. Often when I go, I end up interacting with other people who are there as well. Because I am interacting with the time-space reality on a fourth dimensional level, occasionally I will bump into the thought form (entity) of someone who has just di
  10. What did we possess yesterday? What will we lose today? When the world is shattered like a window, No glass remains between you and the sunflower which was always there. No illusions, no barriers. Just the opportunity to turn towards it. For in the smallest of things, therein lies the greatest of things. There is a grace to be found in those moments. A grace that is lost to us when we are in the midst of grief instead of outside looking in. When the shock and denial and groundlessness that is grief, makes the world around us stand still.
  11. I was on the America Tonight show with Kate Delaney today. It was a short interview, but a poignant one, entirely about ritual cult trauma. As I was doing the interview, it became obvious to me that I am being set up to be a spokesperson and poster child for ritual abuse. Those who do escape from ritual trauma (like most victims of abuse), escape with little to no evidence except the bent and broken parts of their personalities and lives. Their pain is the pain of having no witnesses. Or Their pain is the pain of having witnesses, who themselves are too traumatized to speak. I have met o
  12. I did an interview today. After the interview was over, I found myself thinking about women in general. It is so important that as women, we are out in the world setting an example of what it looks like to fully embody and express ourselves. It is time that those of us who were born female, release our resistance to our own gender and begin to embrace and express our feminine essence. Women have been in resistance to the divine feminine within themselves for far too long just like human society has been in resistance to the divine feminine for far too long. The dimension we are living
  13. What separates those of us who escape from abuse and those who have given themselves over to the abuse (by becoming abusers) is our decision to love. There is an aspect of ourselves which is untouchable. It burns like an eternal fire that cannot be snuffed out. It may flicker, but a flame that flickers can always be coaxed to burn brightly again. And that is the promise that carries me from stage to stage around the world. That is the promise that is worth waking up for. I wrote a poem a while back, directly to the man who created so much contrast for me in my childhood. Perhaps w
  14. We are blind to what is coming when we are drowning in the tyranny of our pain. That is the worst part about pain. Pain, whether it is physical or emotional, closes you up in a prison of “now”; and the now is not a wonderful place when it hurts. The now hurts when we introduce mental concepts about the now, into the now… which is a reality for nearly all of us. Pain convinces you that pain is eternal. You cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel. In many ways, emotional pain is exactly like birth. When you are deep in the contractions, you begin to panic because you feel like it wi
  15. There is no form of bravery in this universe greater than the bravery it takes to love. It seems that the older you get, the more resistance you come into relationships with. Like armor, it prevents injury from entering the heart. It also prevents love from escaping the heart. Sometimes we are lucky and the love shatters through that armor, like floodgates that cannot resist the force of the element they are trying to contain. Other times, we must consciously choose to strip ourselves naked in the face of love. I’ve always hated the expression: “Fool me once, shame on you; fool
  16. Today has ushered in Christmas. In the cusp of a blizzard, I warmed oat milk over the stovetop with Celtic Christmas music playing in the background. We pulled out all of the boxes of Christmas decorations from the garage and unwrapped the items one by one. The Christmas tree was re assembled, we strung lights across the branches and as we hung the ornaments waves of nostalgia flushed up my chest and neck. It’s lovely how we can become attached and sentimental about certain Christmas ornaments. The sight of them brings forth a flood of positive memories and emotions; the last remnants of
  17. A snowstorm hit the town last night and it has not stopped snowing since. I love snowstorms. I love the heaviness of them and the way they close in on you. I love the way they enhance the coziness of houses and the indulgent feel of certain foods. The light reflects off of the flakes, making everything glow. I had to go out into it to make it to an appointment today and I had a very girly moment. Having just painted my toenails, I couldn’t put on boots without destroying the paint job. So, I put on my five inch, open toed, clear acrylic high heels and stepped off of the sidewalk right i
  18. GabijaCij

    Unity

    Promise me now, Promise me always Even as they strike you down with a myriad of hatred and violence, Even as they dismember and destroy you that no man can ever be your enemy. The only thing worth anything is love; Unconditional, invincible, limitless love. One day when you face this world Unburdened by the tyranny of fear and hate and greed Your fellow men will behold you. Across a thousand cycles of living and dying in full bloom Your joy will become eternal. No sun or moon that ever rises, will ever see it fade. Take my hands and hold them.
  19. I took a test yesterday. It was a test called the Clifton StrengthsFinder. It is a popular test in business, managerial and entrepreneurial circles. Essentially, it is designed to unearth your strengths so that you can orient your career choice and business strategies around your talents instead of taking the path of most resistance by trying to overcome your weaknesses. Out of 34 themes, you are given a list of your dominant 5 themes and then a personalized guide and action plan according to the results of the test. My 5 strength themes came out as follows: Achiever Competit
  20. It is Thanksgiving Day, a harvest festival. Thanksgiving is Blake’s favorite holiday. He looks forward to it every year. It is amusing to watch him. He starts making plans for it months in advance and anticipates it like a child anticipates Christmas. Thanksgiving is a holiday with protestant roots traditionally designed to give thanks for the harvest of the preceding year. The pilgrims and puritans brought this holiday to New England (USA) from England as part of a tradition that started during the English reformation called “days of fasting and days of thanksgiving”. It was not celebra
  21. GabijaCij

    SEX

    Sex that is nourished by love is an alchemical phenomenon. This is why it creates life. Over the past two weeks, I have heard the saying again and again “be like water”. It has followed me around. It has caused me to think about water itself as an element. Water, is the combination of hydrogen and oxygen. As the two kiss, a third element is made, an element, which sustains all life. The thirst of all beings on this earth is satiated by it and sustained by it. I had a full day of one on one therapy sessions with my clients yesterday. And the overwhelming theme of the day was sex.
  22. Most people feel relief when the summer comes, for me it is reversed. When I squeeze my feet into my gorgeous red Scarpa T Race boots, a thousand pounds are lifted from my heart. I love the smell of the snow and the familiar sounds of the ski resorts. Yesterday was my first ski day of the season. The resort had come back to life. Lively, excited energy filled the lodges and cafes. I missed the disorganized movements of people as they try to walk in the stiffness of their ski boots. I missed the way that a company of strangers is made intimate by their common love for a sport and an elem
  23. Today is one of those days where I’m a bit taken aback by the human race. When logging onto my e-mail account this morning, I saw a headline about an elk that was put down as a result of becoming too friendly with people. It is not as if I am just a “free love hippie” that doesn’t understand the risk of wildlife becoming too desensitized to people. I grew up with two wilderness rangers for parents. I’ve been around wildlife professionals all my life. And that is precisely what has given rise to my general disappointment in them. There are few loving conservationists in the wildlife profe
  24. The rock music is blaring from the overhead speakers in this little sports bar I am sitting in. I visited the doctor’s office today. The doctor and I have challenged each other to a bet. He thinks that being vegan has greatly negatively affected certain parts of my body and that it will be reflected in various blood tests. I have explained to him that I don’t agree and that not only am I a medical intuitive, I’m also not an “unhealthy” vegan. In fact, I am a health Nazi vegan. So, we have challenged each other to a game of who is right. Out of the corner of my eye, I’m watching th
  25. The London workshop went incredibly well. We had breakfast in the hotel with my new friend Juraj Kocar (the event organizer for the workshop we are planning to hold in the Czech Republic). Saying goodbye to the people I grew close to here in England felt especially bitter and mournful. I don’t want to leave them behind, even though I am excited to be back in the harmonious familiarity of my own home. I’m still eagerly awaiting the invention of the teleportation machine. It will be heaven when travel from one place to another takes seconds. My bodyguard showed up at the hotel ea
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