Online Workshop - 8/13/17 - Q&A Part 2/4

0:00 Shame. Fear of Love being taken away. How to Receive and Feel Love?

6:48 How do you know if something feels bad because it's out of alignment or because it triggers an aspect for integration?

7:50 Fear/nervousness in front of people - performing, fear of facing authority.

12:00 Rupture and repair in relationships. Failure to express what doesn't please you.

13:45 I've been alone, apathetic and depressed for years and have been trying to recover. Always hoped that moving will help me improve. Now it's time to move but I'm afraid that my years of isolation in a shell will hold me back.

16:00 Can we use disidentification to step into the perspective of our Higher Self? And from that perspective perform integration.

18:25 How do you know if you're meant to GROW WITH someone or grow and MOVE ON?

22:50 Sight problems.

26:00 Staying in a job vs quitting. When I go to work I feel that I live as an unhealthy part of me (male, hard, etc.). It makes me not want to go to work because another part of me does not want to be male and hard.


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My shame figure was a lime green Telly Tubby who seemed happy but insecure the neutral room was a relaxing light beige and before i asked to see the shame figure the cutest pink elephant appeared and gave me a hug LOL 

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Guest battlelamb

Posted (edited)

Holy crap, this segment was really relevant to me. I'm glad I got to hear Teal's insights on it.

The "how do you know if you were meant to evolve with somebody" was a question I didn't know how to put into words for some time now. So the answer was: Stop thinking about them, focus on yourself, focus on what your desires are. So doing things like shadow work makes you more aware of yourself, which makes you chase after more/different desires... so it's something you don't have to "consciously think about". So step into your own expansion and don't worry about them. That answer feels like a relief, because I did decide to just focus on my self personally (warming up to doing more than 2 sessions of "shadow work" on myself... it would be really awesome if I had a partner or friend that was also interested in self-healing and exploration  to keep me on point, but that's okay, I have myself. I'm working on trying to have my own back for once! I've got this...)

The vision response was a reminder that everything has consciousness and we're fragmented. *cracks knuckles* Okay, guess I really gotta start talking to my different selves and see what that does for me (instead of just hearing/reading about how it's helpful)

And then the work thing... Her response was 1) Really put some energy into whether I want to stay at that job. What else do you feel like you're gravitating towards. Purpose and jobs are two different things 2) Talk to your "work" aspect... no different than acting as a couples' therapist. How can we introduce more [whatever you feel is lacking] in this role? 
Less often these days, but I used to come home in this "mode" that felt so stressed and toxic, but once the environment of being back at home kicked in, I would just melt into crying it out. One day I did a sort of "gathering together" what it felt like to be in that mode, and got back a very distinct looking figure, male, dark red, hunched over, leering, eyeing expression, very angular and muscly but not attractive at all, stand off-ish, weird creepy atmosphere around him, he hisses very quietly... after tongueing/feeling out a label for him, I cleaned it up to a "Velereuse" as his name. He didn't want to talk to me at all that particular day, but now I am familiar with his, uh, feeling? Baby steps. Most of the time I'm too caught up in whatever rush is going on at work to be conscious that he's "taken over", but again, baby steps. There is a lot of fear and "automatic" going on when he's there. It's hard. Maybe I need to go for smaller targets/parts of him first, 'cause yikes.

Anyway, lots for me to digest right there for myself! Going to actually try talking to my vision aspects right now before I continue onto part 3! :D Gotta start being about it and not just learning passively!

Edited by battlelamb

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About the spiritual personality. I did it for 6 years. With the "spiritual group" it was a tai ch and than suuuper high healung course (3years). And the healing tehnique used was the "going to higher self". I did not ginish that course. The teacher was/is an abusive person woth HUGA ? spiritual personality. Most of us experianced desintegration instate of integration and growth of spiritial personality. We isolated our selves from phisicality and got totaly lost. So i am not a fan of this technique it can end up as spiritual bypass. Higher self persoective is great. But it has little veeery little knowing about phisicality... so why use plane to ride the roads??? 

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My shame self a an ogre with bad claw looking teeth and it smelled , it was dirty af too , so I gave her a shower , a buddy and stuck a diamond encrusted diamond shaped block of gold in her chest (solar plexus area) I feel awesome 

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