uclasteven1

Career Burnout & No Motivation

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Career Burnout & No Motivation

I’m asking for help since I just can’t find any clarity right now and seem to just make things worse the more I try to work at fixing my situation.

I feel exhausted and overwhelmed all the time, to the point that I had to leave my job and move in with my parents. Normally I’m a highly motivated, sociable, optimistic, talented, driven person, but the last year I’ve lost all motivation and joy in life. Lots of spiritual work, therapy sessions, and two antidepressants have led me to this point where I don’t even want to get out of bed or live my life. I feel so alone and living at home keeps triggering old traumas. How do I get myself motivated enough to get a job when part of me doesn’t want to work? How do I live at home with my parents when part of me hates them and never wants to see them again?

thanks for any help,

Steven

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Sounds like a painful situation where you are completely stuck...

Was there a specific reason that caused you to lose "all motivation and joy in life" last year?

Maybe instead of forcing yourself to get motivated and to apply for jobs, you can start with doing small, simple things in everyday life that make you feel relief or some degree of lightness/flow. Since you're so overwhelmed already you can try to limit yourself to just doing ONE main thing a day. If you are exhausted it usually means that even when you're doing nothing, your mind is doing everything...

I usually don't like the whole gratitude/positive focus thing but I think in your case, since you are physically stuck living with your parents, it might help you. You can try to find small things you are genuinely grateful for in your surroundings, and gradually you might reach a point where you are a vibrational match to some sort of improvement that helps you find a way out of this situation. A job might be a way out but there are also other ways that may come to you.

I struggle with having no desire to get out of bed too, and really the only thing that helps is to have one thing you look forward to in the day. Even if it is a small thing. I feel that rejuvenating this spark comes before motivating yourself to get a job etc, otherwise you will have no energy to motivate yourself with... Hope this helps...

Edited by Eveslofl

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On 1/30/2019 at 6:48 PM, Eveslofl said:

Was there a specific reason that caused you to lose "all motivation and joy in life" last year?...

Thanks for the response @Eveslofl, I’ve been trying to incorporate gratitude more, it does help to start to move the moment in another direction. It just feels like there’s a whole lot of momentum opposite of where I want to go! But taking it easy on myself at this time really helps.

To answer your question, losing motivation I think was more a result of losing certain coping mechanisms over the last year: a toxic friend who convinced me to drink a lot, binge eating ice cream, and people-pleasing at my job. Now I have less tolerance for BS and took a sobering look at my life and realized I was miserable!

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Not an easy situation. 

If you have a decent savings account, then maybe you can afford to take a brake from life, sink in deep and rethink where to go next or what to do. However, if you don't have savings and on top of that you have things that require regular maintenance, a car for ex, insurance, debt, cell phone, hobby etc. then I highly suggest you to look at it as your main motivation right now because you have what to lose and I doubt you want that. Your parents can only pay for you so much which is why it often gets to the point where they start telling "go get the job!". I'd hate that too. But you know your parents better.

 

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15 hours ago, uclasteven1 said:

To answer your question, losing motivation I think was more a result of losing certain coping mechanisms over the last year: a toxic friend who convinced me to drink a lot, binge eating ice cream, and people-pleasing at my job. Now I have less tolerance for BS and took a sobering look at my life and realized I was miserable!

I see... it’s good that you lost those coping mechanisms though, even though that caused you to go straight into the discomfort...

15 hours ago, uclasteven1 said:

It just feels like there’s a whole lot of momentum opposite of where I want to go! But taking it easy on myself at this time really helps.

Same here. I have been doing some parts work (I put it off for so long) and starting to see some results. Examining those opposite forces would be great for you but since you said you’re being triggered all the time at home I imagine it’s almost impossible to do shadow work safely... That’s why I thought maybe if you could first manifest some way out so you can work on these issues in a safe place that would be good.

Edited by Eveslofl

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On 2/2/2019 at 6:04 PM, Eveslofl said:

Same here. I have been doing some parts work (I put it off for so long) and starting to see some results.

Thanks @Garnet and @Eveslofl for your responses, I've been doing more work recently in Shadow work and the Completion process too. I did finally find a job that felt right, and still working on some resistance around going to work, day after day. And regarding my parents, I've been looking for ways to hold space for their perspective as well as mine, although I have a tendency towards self-doubt and a susceptibility to gaslighting. I've learned to see that they are just unaware and not really doing these things consciously, so I'm practicing not really taking anything they say seriously, and just finding the humor in it. Instead of taking their criticism personally, I look for the humor in the fact that they don't know everything that's going on in my life, in my body, in my head, in my emotional body, and just let them think what they choose to think.

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