Ronja Tarkanmäki

Psychosis or spiritual awakening?

31 posts in this topic

1 minute ago, said:

Im going to read your entire post tomorrow when i have time. But i want to share something with you.


I always had this "sixth sense" about things. It may come as an idea that i dont have to force myself to think, it just sort of pop up in my head with no effort, but is something that actually "occurs" to me. It can be things about people that they havent share with me, but when i ask they get surprised and say im right, things about their past or things that are currently going on. Sometimes is like i can predict life events or make impredictable big time life decisions that always turn out on my favor.

It also works the next way, and its something that sometimes get me in trouble, specially when i was in school. I have always been a distracted person, and usually dont pay attention if i dont feel "stimulated"... sometimes this "knowledge" about things that i haven even read or researched before just pop up in my head. Like: people telling me something they know because its their carreer or about their jobs, for some reason im able to interrupt them and share "what i know" about what they are talking about and 99 percent of the times i come up with a concept, a process, or share knowledge and people usually freak out or get surprised. It used to happen a lot in school, i never paid attention and i was always focused on talking to somebody while teachers where teaching, then they would ask me a question regarding the topic they were teaching and i was always able to come up with the right answers even when i did not studied the topic or paid no attention.


I have been doing a lot of inner work for my entire life, trying to figure out or make sense about all my suffering... everytime i come up with what i consider are "the right" questions to my family, they say im having a psychotic attack...


Same thing with my ex wife when out of the blue i asked her if she was hiding something from me, i asked her nicely because i wanted to do things right and solve whatever that was going on... She obviously denied everything, but my gut feeling said otherwise... that happened like 5 months ago... 3 weeks ago i found on her phone conversations with this dude dated from a year ago... and they have been talking to each other pretty much every day for over a year...


Dont let nobody tell you you are crazy, specially your close ones. Train that gut feeling, because it is usally right. Share peace love and respect but what is more important, listen and love yourself first. 

Last year i told my family that my dad should check himself for cancer because i felt like he was sick or was going to get sick, and that was one of those ideas that sort of pop up in my mind... they did not paid attention... he es under aggressive chemo therapy right now because he got pancreatic cancer... When they diagnosed him i told him to start RSO cannabis oil treatment plus the chemo because just the chemo and surgery would not help him. He finished his first round of chemo and surgery, and his pancreas is OK now, but cancer spread to his intestines a little bit... its like im always right about everything. 

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