Nuala_Brooks

to meds or not to meds...

3 posts in this topic

to meds or not to meds...

I want to ask people’s opinion on taking medication to treat mental illness. I consider my psychoses to be spiritually linked and I'm not sure I believe that the label of mental illness is either true or helpful. I find the way that the Western world deals with so called mental illness, an abomination and reflective of a complete lack of humanity and emotional intelligence. These painful states of mind are reactionary and real and can involve a spectrum of beauty and terror and awakening in ways many can’t comprehend, yet you’re treated as subhuman and pretty much tortured into submission.

I don’t see it as illness. I think that if you are sensitive and born into this world, it's going to be hard as hell. It makes me so sad, the whole thing, but I'm at the point where I'm choosing in terms of my survival

The more I have read on the subject, the more it has become a grey area. I am reluctant to abide by the western solution of burying the issues, but whenever I come off meds, the trauma, partly inflicted by the mental health system itself, arises so ferociously, every day is a struggle, and facing the process alone, without like minded souls, is too much. I seem unable to behave 'normally' or to function in my current environment without them, and I’m scared of being sectioned again. I feel like it would be possible to go med free, but in peaceful surroundings where people are compassionate to the intricacies of these experiences, no societal pressures etc, just a focus on healing, but the common solution Is to quieten people’s minds and experiences enough so that they can slide into a normal life with a normal job. These are the signifiers of wellness to the people around me, but I am so far removed from that reality, I just don’t know where to turn.

So to go against what I believe in order to build a future where I can look after myself, or to struggle on my peculiar path of suffering with the hope that there might be a light at the end, that is the question haha.

Also, do you think that you can take brain altering medication and still progress spiritually? Surely the spirit surpasses all those things, but I don’t know.

Sorry this is a bit of a ramble but any response would be much appreciated.

 

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Hi Nuala, beautiful name. I can relate, so, so much, actually, i can't believe how much this post refers to me, too. It's incredible though, if I would to tell you my experience, personal, familial, i can relate to everything that you wrote here, I mean, everything. And you have put it wonderfully, you are very much in alignment, and you see further the path, and you even know your answer already, it seems to me.

Let me tell you what i have concluded from what i underwent

Holding to your values, is far from a struggle. Knowing you haven't deserted yourself is such a rewarding feeling, in a way. A feeling of bravery and determination, though it can be very hard. Maybe i am using improper words, but, i trusted so many of those ppl, so much i have been attacked, denied, intimidated, i was in such a distress, that i fled everywhere i could, running away from myself, running away from beings that took every bit of freedom that i had, to speak, to act, to feel, to be. 

i was on psychotics and, what was terrifying to me was the effect they had on me. I witnessed every alteration these pills did to my awareness, spirit doesn't handle it, TRUST ME, sensitive ppl are already spirited so it shuts them down, i stopped talking, i stopped feeling, i couldnt/didnt think, horrifying, simply horrifying. But i was afraid to leave them, because i was sick right, "I was sick". (it was also my decision cause i didnt know how i would sleep and fuction again without them). Noone believed in me, noone still does, specially my family, relatives. But can i stay beside them anyway? Can i handle their awareness? their projections? Can we trust ppl that have no clue how it is to be us? can we trust ppl that do not really care about us? cant see us, do not hear us, fear for us, rather than believe in us, they have been judged, so they judge, they have been conditioned, so they can only deduct conditionally ? Can we trust the whole society? u said it perfectly already

Turn to you. I am still alone in the processing it, and you know what, Tealers here and angels around make me happy, spiritual world never leaves you. And it will take you to your family, if you dedicate to yourself only and fully. 

Who knows, we might be soul family, you and I, since i still cant believe how much your post resonates with me. And you are very bright, you have explained it all very thoroughly. I didnt know anything about these things and the world then... I still dont.

take care, 

love

M

Edited by Majda

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oh lord... we live In a world that makes a chemical our own brain makes illegal (DMT). We are very disconnected, from our emotions, our bodies, and soul, just brainwashed day one. your body will tell what you can and cant have when tis clean, if someone is able to drink a soda and they feel nothing that's a bad sign, and if you feel an emotion and don't feel it and express that emotion right there and then rather then suppressing it and running aware from it with an addiction then that's another thing we ignore. our body is communicating with us, the awareness inside, we are just this disconnected with ourselves, like the body in me doesn't like soda, the body I am in doesn't like bread, whatever it is your body will tell you, and not lie to yourself to justify why you like something and think you are overriding it with a belief, you are not your body and you need to take care of it and it is constantly communicating with you. when we have an addiction we have that addiction not to feel an emotion whatever it is, but when you allow yourself to feel the emotion you are trying to avoid the addiction is gone, beliefs can also be addictions. We attach meaning to everything, like that emotions is good or that is bad when its neutral, we attach the meaning to it, like a man crying is weak or shaking from trauma isn't normal, its all normal we are not these bodies, let the body do whatever its doing, feel all of it. Life is hard for sure, but I love to be conscious and feel emotions even if its like ow shit that hurt! but you feel it and change the meaning and learn whatever it is that is teaching you. you could feel hot everywhere, a sinking feeling, all of those emotions are normal we just are scared to feel them, something intrinsic. I could only show emotion to a conscious person or that shit wouldn't work you need someone to allow you to feel however you feel. its more emotional and physical, and your soul is the awareness in the body and the more you clear in yourself the more access you have to your soul. Also life isn't easy, but nothing is wrong with you, we are just programmed to believe authority which is doctors when they don't know everything, they don't have the understand of the emptions and the soul and what is the blueprint of that body and whatever the blueprint is nothing is wrong with it, don't try to make a artist a computer programmer, let them be a artist, but yeah whatever your blueprint is nothing is wrong with it. you will get to the point where you will listen to your soul over anyone and be able to see that whatever people project onto you is just a belief system, just a box of limiting beliefs, you learn more about them and where they are In their awareness.

 

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