VitaBa

My partner left to work abroad and I just can not cope with feeling abandoned

4 posts in this topic

My partner left to work abroad and I just can not cope with feeling abandoned

After many years of  repeating a relationship pattern of meeting emotionally unavailable men I have finally met a guy who I felt is my twin flame. Very similar characters with both - mental and physical attraction.

It all felt so natural and intense at the same time. Its like we were meant to meet. I felt like he is me in a masculine form.

Now it has been 2 months since he has left, as he decided to take a very well paid job abroad. No definite plans to reunite again, but he said many times that he needs to do it to earn money and he will do everything to be with me again. 

However lately, I can feel that he became preoccupied with his new job duties (he works on a yacht) and our conversations are shallow and the connection is almost not there anymore.  I am the only one who seems to be suffering. It triggers enormous amounts of pain and abandonment issues in me. 

I would appreciate any suggestion how to cope. Or rather how to accept this situation. I am working on my childhood traumas, but it still hurts like hell. Shall I just call it quits rather than wait?

Thank you all in advance

Edited by VitaBa

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VitaBa,

Any work abroad is temporary and depends on the length of the work visa he has. I don't know how long you two are together but if he left without definite plans..... then.... you probably wasting your time... Usually people discuss this things prior separating because if especially the contract for 1+ years then by now you know if this relationship is serious or what.

We live in a world that is wired with electronic connection so there is no excuse for not keeping things as live as possible . Unless he is old fashioned and prefers writing letters/sending gifts which is wonderful too. I suggest you to ask him directly of where this relationship stand for him and then make a decision . 

 

 

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Man do things like this, they taking harder jobs , making extra miles, to bring more goods to the home , to people they love, this makes them feel more masculine and respected for they hard work, probably he's  suffering inside as well because thinking his sacrificed by going away for good and wellness later. I think you should be more open and double check, does your future dream story pages still matching between together. Best wishes

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Sorry you are going through this. Abandonment issues are LITERALLY the WORST pain everrrrrrrrrr

 

Have have you been following Teal and Ale's relationship troubles (and i think they are probably twin flames Maybe?? )

Many men think they what they want is Money ( but deep down they don't realize they really just want money to get CONNECTION). When they could just go and get connection directly. I. E. the relationship!

My thoughts are that you need to have a REAL heart to heart with him about how this separation is making you feel. 

And ask him what his real priorities are. HOPEFULLY he will want to find a compromise to make both YOU and HE happy in the relationship. 

If not, I suggest, twinflame or not..... You should remember you deserve a relationship where the person DOES want to prioritize your happiness as much as theirs!! You deserve that!!! Seriously!

As BIG of a romantic as I am (believe me I AM) I am beginning to realize - regardless of soul mate / twin flame connections, we need to be with people who WANT to prioritize a relationship with us, and find solutions that work for both people not just one of the people involved.

If your massive amounts of pain, *please* let him know. Express that to him. And brainstorm solutions to the problem. Is there a way you can be with him at his job? Can he look for other kinds of work? Hopefully he wants to find solutions  to alleviate your pain.  Why would you want to be with anyone who doesn't want that for you, right?

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