David B

Fractured -> Transformation --- Integrating negative people?

3 posts in this topic

Fractured -> Transformation --- Integrating negative people?

Essentially everything in my life is fractured,,, it begins with the cell phone, the ipod, and now last week, i fractured my computer screen...  My car needs a new shock absorber in the rear right...  My home I rent, needs a new roof, the washer and dryer need to be replace, floors refinished,  a roommate is subpar with rent but I've kinda grandfathered him in... My body has been fractured for a while, with shoulder and chest injures, prior to that chronic foot injuries... I'm chronically financially tight... and I've always had a 'best' friend, who is a fractured person, and was very loyal too, disowned/estranged me after over 8 years of friendship, my crime, Voting for a particular somebody.

So teal had a twitter quote today, saying that everything must fall apart in order to be transformed.   What am transforming into?   I take the message of integration to heart, particularly with my fractured friend, being that national politics is just a reflection of our personal decisions.    Am I not suppose to try and integrate my gemini twin and reconcile our differences, or am I just suppose upgrade to a new friend?

Also, I feel like im being open to everyone.  Like Im letting down boundaries.   I don't drink, but I ended up talking to some drunk guy the other night, just being present with him.  After a while, I felt like I was wasting my time.   I feel I'm wasting a lot of time... and I'm not sure what I really want to commit to.

I'd like comments about everything in general, not just on the topic of my friend.

Thanks

 

 

 

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3 hours ago, David B said:

 

I'd like comments about everything in general, not just on the topic of my friend.

Thanks

 

Well.. i think your best friend is the key here. It looks like you both fractured so much you forgot who you are to each other.

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David,

As the saying goes"I feel your pain!" There are so many parallels between your life situations and mine it's scary. The only difference probably is that I got my ex wife pregnant,married her then divorced her when my daughter was 2ys old. Then my ex wife basically abandoned us and I became a single parent. My best friend since kindergarten,who I went through all my trials and tribulations with, abandoned me following my youngest daughter's baptism where he was her Godfather. That was 27 years ago. 

I know how hard it is to focus when there's so much shit going down.  I don't recall who said it,may have been an old psychologist I knew,that before there is growth there is confusion. If we didn't know confusion we wouldn't know clarity.

Hang in there,continue to reach out to others and hopefully your blessings will come.

Sheamus   

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