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Feeling confused

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Feeling confused


In 2 years I'll have to go to college,and my problem is that I've got no real motivation to study hard.I am a pretty good student, but because of my lack of motivation/direction/purpose I have mediocre grades.

So.. Logically I tried to find a reason for pushing forward.And as you may already see,I haven't found any.Yeah if I don't study hard I won't have a good job,no money blah blah blah.But this negative reasons do not motivate me.

And also..I watched videos and read articles about purpose,passion..And I'm confused..Some say that you have passion only when you become good at something, whatever that may be,and others say that there is a certain thing meant for you to do.

There are things that I like,but I'm not passionate about.Should I further learn and specialize in them?Or should I look for something else?

I tried to motivate myself through thinking that I will help others,that I will be an example for others,many things in my life will improve etc..But nothing wakes me up.I don't really feel alive.

It is needed to say that I suffered from depression and anxiety,but trough meditation and affirmations I managed to break out of depression.I guess I'm not depressed anymore,I don't feel like that.The thing is that I'm not excited about life..

In conclusion..I don't have anything to motivate me and I don't know what should I do with my life..What am I supposed to do in this situation?

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Ok, I'm gonna be honest here. Latelly I think colleges are going to shit. And I'm a teacher dude, I loove learning, the biggest nerd ever. And I went to 4 different colleges, trying to find the "right one".  In the end I'm glad that I finished one, because I got to be a teacher in a official capacity because of it.

Full disclosure, I'm from Brazil, so take that as you may.

If you want to be a doctor, a engineer, a lawyer, teacher,one of those, you know, go to college, that still needs a degree.

But my friend, if you want to be an artist, designer, film major,or do some 'social study', 'gender study', philosophy, save your cash, don't be in debt, study by your self, or do some classes in studios or online.


Now about finding your passion, how about start making a list of things that you don't want to do... ever? That shoud come easy and make you feel that you are going somewhere. Or how about a list of "things to be alive for" I did one when was comitted to not being depressed anymore.

Most importantly,DONT BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF, you are young, you are not supposed to have all the answers now. Passions will come and go, focus on being healthy and happy, and curious and open.

good luck.

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