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Im in a weird Romatic Relatioship(s)

M23, I'm in a relationship with a woman who had a boyfriend and she still wants to have both the relationships. It’s been about a year and half now with the current friendship/relationship. She lives with him and I go and visit her 3 hours away when I can. I thought that she would leave her boyfriend and that I would be with her and live with her but there is so much going on in the relationship that I can feel myself anymore. I have to connect with the other boyfriend to intentionally provide for two people's need to get approval for the other. She really wants my attention and love and constantly pulls my energy to get it. I feel emotionally, mentally, spiritually, as well as sometimes physically and sexually drained. They are both wonderful people together in their own relationships and I feel that if on their own they will do just fine. I feel the woman that I'm sexually active with is influencing us both to get what she wants and for us to feel bad when she is not happy. I want to tell her to be responsible for her own happiness and not be in the relationship any more. The feelings I have felt before I have never had in any other relationships before. The highs of love and romantic sexual desire is thought the ceiling. I'm waking up in my own spirituality and the truth of the world with the occulted knowledge that has been hidden by the powers that should not be. Both my girlfriend and her boyfriend want to stay in willful ignorance and to stay in that as long as it doesn't affect their freedom. I have brought empowering information into their hands but I can tell that they don't want to be bothered with the truth. What I want to have in life is someone life my current partner in my area living with me and wanting to grow into leaning the truth of the world. Love like my girlfriend and I have had in the past; all of the passion and all of the love with our sexual relationship and empowering each other to become our greatest versions. A lot more can be said in many different joyous and disempowering situations with my girlfriend. I’m really lost now and alone when it comes to this. I tried to reach out to others to see if I can work things out. I might need couching from someone. Could anyone help?


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I was in a similar situation... and it nearly destroyed me.  I'm telling you with every ounce of experience I have that if you go down this road, no matter how well you think things will turn out, that it will lay you to waste.  There are many things at work here; co-dependent relationship dynamics, projection, childhood pain going unacknowledged, good old fashioned selfishness and insecurity, etc.   

I know it's hard, but you need to take stock and cut the cord.  

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