insightfuldreamer

Afraid of Men-CP

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Afraid of Men-CP

Dear Everyone,

I would like to change a belief of mine relative to men. I feel as if all men are evil and are trying to hurt me. I am unable to apply the completion process as I get distracted, impatient and/or fall asleep. What are some other ways I can work to change this persistent belief? 

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Try the completion process with the support of a friend you trust.  Make sure you truly feel safe to explore the roots of your fear of men.

Traumas related to safety and abandonment are very difficult to do alone.  I would wish that one day you can see men who are kind and who want to love you. 

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Write down how you feel about men, just do a stream of consciousness exercise and then go into one of your beliefs using whatever method feels best for you, whether that be Byron Katie's The Work, or another belief process, or the CP. Listen to yourself to know which belief to work on and which process to use on that belief. "Men" is a huge topic, and carries many beliefs with it. You might be getting stuck because there is an underlying belief that might seem unrelated to the subject, so also go into Teal's Core Belief process on the belief that calls to you the most.

It took me a while to undo my negative beliefs about men, I'm still doing it honestly, you have to go one step at a time. Sometimes those steps seem very small and like you won't get anywhere by going into them, but once you do, you realize that one little belief is a cornerstone to a bunch of others. 

For example, I had a belief that I could not trust myself which caused me massive financial and career problems, like MASSIVE, and once I uncovered that belief the whole system that was keeping me back from my goals just crumbled. I didn't even have to do much beliefwork, just the knowing that this was a belief that I carried my whole life was enough to set major changed in motion for me.

Good luck :) 

Edited by lightworker
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On 12/2/2016 at 8:16 AM, insightfuldreamer said:

Afraid of Men-CP

Dear Everyone,

I would like to change a belief of mine relative to men. I feel as if all men are evil and are trying to hurt me. I am unable to apply the completion process as I get distracted, impatient and/or fall asleep. What are some other ways I can work to change this persistent belief? 

Write down all the ways that you are a man, or at least masculine. 

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13 hours ago, Central Sun said:

Write down all the ways that you are a man, or at least masculine. 

This is excellent. Thanks :D

On 12/2/2016 at 11:35 PM, Amazawa said:

Try the completion process with the support of a friend you trust.  Make sure you truly feel safe to explore the roots of your fear of men.

Traumas related to safety and abandonment are very difficult to do alone.  I would wish that one day you can see men who are kind and who want to love you. 

Thanks @Amazawa I'll try find a friend who can help me do the CP. 

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On 12/3/2016 at 6:04 AM, lightworker said:

Write down how you feel about men, just do a stream of consciousness exercise and then go into one of your beliefs using whatever method feels best for you, whether that be Byron Katie's The Work, or another belief process, or the CP. Listen to yourself to know which belief to work on and which process to use on that belief. "Men" is a huge topic, and carries many beliefs with it. You might be getting stuck because there is an underlying belief that might seem unrelated to the subject, so also go into Teal's Core Belief process on the belief that calls to you the most.

It took me a while to undo my negative beliefs about men, I'm still doing it honestly, you have to go one step at a time. Sometimes those steps seem very small and like you won't get anywhere by going into them, but once you do, you realize that one little belief is a cornerstone to a bunch of others. 

For example, I had a belief that I could not trust myself which caused me massive financial and career problems, like MASSIVE, and once I uncovered that belief the whole system that was keeping me back from my goals just crumbled. I didn't even have to do much beliefwork, just the knowing that this was a belief that I carried my whole life was enough to set major changed in motion for me.

Good luck :) 

Thanks for the response. I am familiar with the Core Belief Process and The Work. My core belief usually comes down to something along the lines of 'I am unlovable or I have no value'. I'm glad you were able to find insight from the belief work :D

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On 12/4/2016 at 4:09 AM, insightfuldreamer said:

My core belief usually comes down to something along the lines of 'I am unlovable or I have no value'.

These are similar to my core beliefs.  What really helped me shift these core beliefs was spending time in my Safe Haven watching my inner children interact with my new, loving mother.  As I watch them receive all the love and tenderness that were never available to me, a warmth blossomed from my heart chakra into bliss.  It was powerfully healing, and I am a very different person after coming out of that healing. I am so much more comfortable with myself, and my relationships with men and women have become more authentic and satisfying.  

Perhaps you may want to consider giving that a try also?  

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Guest Hyejin_Jang
37 minutes ago, Amazawa said:

These are similar to my core beliefs.  What really helped me shift these core beliefs was spending time in my Safe Haven watching my inner children interact with my new, loving mother.  As I watch them receive all the love and tenderness that were never available to me, a warmth blossomed from my heart chakra into bliss.  It was powerfully healing, and I am a very different person after coming out of that healing. I am so much more comfortable with myself, and my relationships with men and women have become more authentic and satisfying.  

Perhaps you may want to consider giving that a try also?  

This is very helpful and insightful. I didn't know that staying in the Safe Haven can be healing too. Maybe I should read the CP book, again!

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6 hours ago, Amazawa said:

These are similar to my core beliefs.  What really helped me shift these core beliefs was spending time in my Safe Haven watching my inner children interact with my new, loving mother.  As I watch them receive all the love and tenderness that were never available to me, a warmth blossomed from my heart chakra into bliss.  It was powerfully healing, and I am a very different person after coming out of that healing. I am so much more comfortable with myself, and my relationships with men and women have become more authentic and satisfying.  

Perhaps you may want to consider giving that a try also?  

Thanks @Amazawa That's a great idea. However, I haven't created a safe haven as I am still undecided on what I consider 'safe'

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37 minutes ago, insightfuldreamer said:

I haven't created a safe haven as I am still undecided on what I consider 'safe'

I sense this may be the area to focus on.  Please find a way to feel safe. 

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