EverlyWoods732

Trauma

7 posts in this topic

I need to grow beyond this point I wish I had better care givers. 

My mom is very invalidating and not at all good for me. I really wish I had someone else to act as a mother figure for me this is my cry for help. 

My everyday life is closed off from people and my mom is emotionally abusive. I had an idea today that people could come together and create a family for people who had a really unhealthy family growing up and dysfunctional relationships with there mom and dad. 

Create a scenario where you do have a truly good mother figure who meets your needs and a father figure who meets your needs 

My mom and dad do not understand me at all on a deep level.they have no empathy when it comes to my pain unless I'm balling in tears they invalidate me. It's a living hell because I can't grow past these wounds and I swear to God I want to I swear my life could be beautiful and part of me wants to end it all

Sincerely, Eve... Please help

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Well! Have you contacted any1 in this community near your locality to share some of their time with you? Please do...you are not so near to me i guess or i would have invited you. where do you live?

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@EverlyWoods732, while you feel that your mom invalidates you, you are doing exactly the same thing with her. she is this person that thinks and feels like this and that, and when you say that she's wrong or that she should have been different, you invalidate her, no?

anyways, why do you make it about your mom? your world is based on your beliefs and you are the only one who has to validate them to make them true.

and another thing: our set of beliefs/angle of view/individual perspective are continuously being challenged, in order to be refined, to evolve, to get closer to the essence of truth.  the choice to keep or discard, validate or invalidate your thoughts/feelings/beliefs/whatever is always yours and only yours. no one else can do that for you. you are more free than you think. 

hugs

@Amit, you're a good kid.

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On 31/10/2016 at 10:01 PM, EverlyWoods732 said:

Yes i have & my mother always invalidates me and gives me advice i really dont wanna hear...

yeah, i want to leave so bad :)

You can hear it but no need to follow it. just listen to her and go to the depth of her character and then you can accept or reject. You can always politely say no. if you run from the situation now.. later you may face similar situation, then what will you do? Are you having or working on such tools which can strengthen your inner child? If you perceive that water has already running over the bridge...you can take help from few people here by messaging them personally. This will help you to have perception that will work for you.

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On 2016-10-28 at 0:51 PM, EverlyWoods732 said:

I need to grow beyond this point I wish I had better care givers. 

My mom is very invalidating and not at all good for me. I really wish I had someone else to act as a mother figure for me this is my cry for help. 

My everyday life is closed off from people and my mom is emotionally abusive. I had an idea today that people could come together and create a family for people who had a really unhealthy family growing up and dysfunctional relationships with there mom and dad. 

Create a scenario where you do have a truly good mother figure who meets your needs and a father figure who meets your needs 

My mom and dad do not understand me at all on a deep level.they have no empathy when it comes to my pain unless I'm balling in tears they invalidate me. It's a living hell because I can't grow past these wounds and I swear to God I want to I swear my life could be beautiful and part of me wants to end it all

Sincerely, Eve... Please help

Hi @EverlyWoods732

I am sorry your mother cannot validate your feelings, and be the nurturing caring mother than everyone aspires to have. I can feel your pain in the back of my throat, as my eyes fill with tears. My heart feels shallow when I tap in to your energy. I would feel the exact same way as you, if I was in your shoes. 

I am not your biological mother, but let me be a energetic mother to you. Like a guardian. I'm holding you in my arms, and it's okay here. This is a safe place, and it's okay to cry. 

I can understand your current frustration with where you are in your life, it is a hell for you. But I believe in you, and I want to see you do better, and feel better. And the fact you have gotten on here, and had the courage to make this post, is already an amazing start, and you are helping yourself more than you think. 

 

We are all here for you, and support you, even if only a few of us reply to your post, all of our energy is focused on you, and you healing your trauma. 

 

I see that you have said your every day life is closed off from people. Do you work? Are you in school? What do you do with your time? Maybe we can think of some ways for you to get out and around meeting new people, and creating life changing experiences. You never know who will be waiting around the street corner... :) 

 

PS. I love you!

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