Rain 369

So Simple Its Complex?

3 posts in this topic

This a new journey, path or what ever you would like to call it, to spirituality.  It has taken at least 20 years to get where I am at now.  I've read many posts and many of you are so far long that I'm actually feel somewhat intimidated about posting this topic.  So here it goes...Over the past few months I have been watching various You Tube vid's about spirituality and Teal & Ralph Smart  are the 2 that I respond most to.  I watched their videos and it was like hell yeah that's it, this what I believe, this is how the world should look, these are thoughts I have.  It's joy to watch these 2.  I feel as if I have resolved or am in the process of over coming the pain of my childhood.  Which was growing up in a small town in Nebraska always feeling like I didn't fit in and being bullied in from middle school through high school bcs I was different.  Guess what I was different.  I am gay.  Then add to this I was raised in very religious home & an only child.  My parents did love & still do love me, but their marriage was hell.  They fought all the time.  My dad confessed the only reason he stayed married was bcs of me  & that he realized 6 months into the  marriage he made a mistake & really  didn't love my mom.  Well by then my mom was pregnant w/ me.  Well my mother over compensated because she was not getting what she needed from my dad as a husband  and focused of all her energy on me.  Always fussing over me, making me feel like I had to be perfect.  My dad on the other hand was distant in how I treat w/ me saying I never seemed interested in doing anything w/ him.  My parents did divorce after 20 years of marriage.  I've come to peace w/ my up bringing and feel very lcuk to have 2 parents that do love me, but still have anger to how I was treated in school.  That anger still reverberates in how treat people.  Mostly when I'm frustrated by the person behavior.  Wow this is getting a lot longer than  I thought it would so I'll move to my next big trauma. The death  of my partner Al.  Sept. 23rd was 9 years since his passing.  When I met him I was just looking for a hook up.   When I saw him it was like holy shit, this is it, real true love at first sight.  The connection, the bond was so strong in that one instant.  I have never felt anything like that in my life.  The total joy in connecting w/ one person in one instant.  God I still miss him.  And yes still love him.  We had 9 years together.  Not gonna lie it wasn't always perfect and yes we did have arguments.   Just part of any relationship.  But it was growth and growth can be painful.   Al was diagnosed  w/ stage 4 lung cancer and passed 3 months latter. The  best way I can describe it is that my life was this glass sphere and it all came crashing down.  Broken and shattered.  Shards every where.  I managed and made it through w/ the help of friends, my mom & dad.  I was never angry over AL's death.  I remember one day praying God if you have to take him make it fast and make it as painless as possible.  Which it was. I'm now w/ new partner, Ty, for 6 yrs.       

If you're still w/ me thanks.  I am getting to point very soon, so please hang on.   Over the years I've time to think over many things and the events of my life and my thoughts.  Like I said earlier I have such an affinity w/ the Teal & Ralph, which leads me to this question:

Is spirituality so simple that it is to complex for our minds to fully comprehend.  Is it accepting events of our lives remembering them and looking at them and how they made you you?   I always believed that we all make our own destiny long before being spiritually awake.  I also have always thought perception is reality.  We all have our own perception hence many realities.  OK one my latest thoughts is that time does not exists.  I have many more and will share but this post is much longer than I intended.  Also would love any suggestions on books to read bcs  so far.  Many thanks for reading. 

 

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4 hours ago, Rain 369 said:

Is spirituality so simple that it is to complex for our minds to fully comprehend.  Is it accepting events of our lives remembering them and looking at them and how they made you you? 

in the future right after ww3 lol, that's a dark joke, sorry, I think we will just all be aware of the spiritual knowledge and the way the universe works through us and it is inside us, its all complete illusion it will just be like a new discovery that is really old. call it god/love/source/simulation/physics/illusion whatever you want, we will get there eventually and it won't be a "belief".

everyone is dealing with shit so I'm happy for all facades to go down, we hide it and play like everything is fine, but everyone is dealing with someone no matter how perfect their life looks, at our core we can all relate to death and all that stuff, but again the facades make us lose connection and we have to make believe like everything is fine. Everyone is just an aspect of you.

4 hours ago, Rain 369 said:

Also would love any suggestions on books to read bcs  so far.

I would recommend writing, if your higher self is on you start knowing shit lol.

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Spirituality is both simple and too complex or just too different.
First you need to know what you define as spirituality because there are a lot logical implications which can lead you to guesses or even answers with the use of your mind.
There are also things that go beyond what the mind can comprehend which you actually can experience and they would be life changing but you could never explain them by the use of your mind.
Your consciousness is able experience those things but your mind can not translate them into our reality, if it can it is just a simplified version. We can for example simplify the matter and call it infinity but our mind does not know what it actually is. 

I for my part accepted most of those events and changed my perspective to the degree that im thankful for any experience in my life because it is what we are here for. Without the negative there is no positive. Thats why the best we can do is to embrace the negative as a part of us and our destiny instead of making it worse by resisting and rejecting it thats where suffering comes from, just the pain will never be able to break you but the suffering will!
Desting does exist in a way but it is not a constant it can always be changed by conciousness because conciousness is what made up the destiny in the first place.
Yes perception is reality, but there are many different realities depending on the dimension. In the highest of all dimensions there is only one reality, in our dimension there are as many realities as there are different beings.
Time is very complex i would guess that it does not exist in the highest dimension but other than that i dont really know.

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