kath_alina

Completion Process without specific memories

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Completion Process without specific memories

Hey,

I struggle a lot with feelings of loneliness, abandonment and paralyzation of my whole body. Besides it is hard for me to really connect with other people.

I already know, or can imagine, where these feelings come from. It's because my father died when I was two years old. The rest of my family tried to do their best to make life happy for me, anyway. But they never talked to me about my dad...

But now I know why I feel the way I feel. I already did a lot of work to slowly uncover the truth behind my feelings, which I never knew before. So I discovered Teal and her amazing work. So every time I feel this feeling of loneliness and paralyzation I do CP, or try to do it, but I have difficulties... I get into the emotion as deep as I can, and usually it makes me cry. But I do not receive any memories or pictures I can work with. I can only imagine situations which probably have occurred, but nothing comes naturally up in my mind. It is just this feeling. Maybe this is, because it has not been one specific occurrence which has happened, but since this day, many years of not getting this connection, which I needed, anymore.

Has anyone tips for me, what to do or how to continue the process? I'd be really really thankful for any hints...

Kathalina

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"I can only imagine situations which probably have occurred, but nothing comes naturally up in my mind"

You should work with the situations that "probably" have occurred. It does not matter if they did or did not if you imagine them they are already real enough to work on them.

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4 hours ago, kath_alina said:

But I do not receive any memories or pictures I can work with. I can only imagine situations which probably have occurred, but nothing comes naturally up in my mind. It is just this feeling.

Some suggestions for you to consider, kath_alina:

1.  For abandonment trauma, the process works MUCH better if you find someone to be present with you as you go through the process.  The presence of a trusted friend is already healing all by itself, and you will feel safer accessing your memories without re-experiencing abandonment again as a trauma. This is why Teal has consistently recommended a facilitator for abandonment trauma.  If you feel comfortable, feel free to reach out to me for assistance.

2.  Memories do not always come as a visuals... often it just comes as a feeling.  This is especially so when the root trauma occurs in early childhood.  So, trust what comes up and try to sink into the feeling.  I highly recommend you read Teal's description of Step 4 in her new book, starting on page 100.

3.  Sometime only the feeling needs to be integrated.  So, just being with the feeling that comes up is enough to integrate the trauma. If that is the case, the actual memory may never come up.

Sending you love and support for your journey toward becoming whole again. :)

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Thanks for your quick responses!!

Okay, so maybe the feelings and 'self-made memories' are enough... I will try to work with this at the moment. 

If nothing happens I may come back to your loving offer, Amazawa. Thank you so much!!

:-) :-) :-)

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I went into the memory of my birth and I "saw" it through the "eyes" of my fetus and then infant self (lol), it was entirely speculation on the part of my mind (visual-wise), but the feelings were real and I integrated a trauma that way! My mom later told me what I experienced. remembered was completely accurate! It's definitely ok to make things up if it feels right to do so and if it feels natural and not forced :) 

Edited by lightworker
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