Treesarestill

Hopeless in Completion Process

9 posts in this topic

Hopeless in Completion Process

I am feeling very frustrated . I can't help but feel very hopeless and frustrated in this process. It's not working for me and I'm ready to just give up on life. Death is better than this endless suffering. I feel like this "bliss" that you speak of is unachievable. I hate my life I don't know how to connect with people. I isolate myself from people because I know that I'm a vibration match to people who reject me and hurt me. I choose to stay isolated in my bedroom. I don't want to go out into the world until I've had at least 1 successful integration. I'm trying soo hard to work on myself, I read your book but I still have no hope. What should I do?

 

 

(I posted this in the Ask Teal section of the forum in hopes that she will respond)

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6 hours ago, Treesarestill said:

Hopeless in Completion Process

I am feeling very frustrated . I can't help but feel very hopeless and frustrated in this process. It's not working for me and I'm ready to just give up on life. Death is better than this endless suffering. I feel like this "bliss" that you speak of is unachievable. I hate my life I don't know how to connect with people. I isolate myself from people because I know that I'm a vibration match to people who reject me and hurt me. I choose to stay isolated in my bedroom. I don't want to go out into the world until I've had at least 1 successful integration. I'm trying soo hard to work on myself, I read your book but I still have no hope. What should I do?

 

 

(I posted this in the Ask Teal section of the forum in hopes that she will respond)

You isolate yourself and try to integrate the wounds. But isolation is a too big of a bite for you right now.
Connection, even though it comes with hurt and rejection, is a bit better from this situation. Because you will at least have people around you, and rejection and hurt traumas are fairly easier to integrate. Isolation must be dealt with later; after finding connection. But first; deal with the problems of connection. 
I would find connection if I were you. In ANY way.

And you know what.. If you find an easier, safer connection, (this is my personal advice :) ) try internet! Go on chat rooms. Download social apps on your phone that allow you to meet people. Then have their phone numbers and make these people a part of your life... Take small steps at a time.

The worst is isolation. Worst you can go through, is isolation. Find connection first, and then after you find connection, you'll find more strength to deal with the isolation trauma within you.

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Dude, I no expert but as far as I get what the completion process is about... you basically sit with the uncomfortable sensation of isolation until you feel complete. You can ask to see what your isolation and lack of ability to connect looks like is shape, form, size, material, and when u get it, speak to it by saying "Im completely here with you now" 

Ask to become ok with isolation. 

Ask to relax in isolation.

Ask to be with yourself exactly as you are, saying it's ok to feel this way. Identify the way you feel. 

Trust that the processs will work. Trust the completion process will work ok. 

 

How do you think you will know when completion has been reached?

 

How would you know if you have integrated isolation?

 

@Treesarestill

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21 hours ago, Treesarestill said:

it's not as easy as it sounds to make a connection. I have really bad social anxiety. I wish it was easy for me to open a conversation with someone

Try it on the internet first. You'll get anxious, but it will subside as you go on. Trust me... It eventually subsides. 
ANY kind of connection is better than this. Because at least now you're experimenting with your anxiety. You can see that it gets better. You can see that social anxiety isn't the end all be all. 

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Hi,

If your feelings of hopelessness and frustration are strong, you can work the completion process with those feelings by going deep into them.  You go down the memory lane as far as possible while focusing on the sensation in your body.

If that doesn't bring back some earlier painful memories or lead you anywhere, you have to go out and meet people, risking rejections.  In short, you have to get triggered, but it's easier said than done, especially when you work on yourself without any professional help.

You may try this writing technique explained in the following video.

 

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hey, @Treesarestill, beautiful name! 

edit: a few more words come about.

you say that you are ready to give up on life, which probably means that interacting with the outwards world is painful for you, for whatever reasons, right now. at the same time, you felt drawn to the completion process and it gives you comfort to think that by sticking with it, you'll get to feel better. 

I'd say that you've got it, you're already doing what you're supposed to be doing, you have picked the thing that makes you feel a bit better, as who you are right now.

the tiny trick is to not get attached to the outcome of it, because that sets you up to a loop of disappointment. what i mean is realise that you are not doing it to get some results in the future, but you are doing it because in a particular moment that's the best thing you can do to feel better in that particular now. just keep your attention present with the process, in the now, rather than focusing on a possible future that the practice can bring about. 

you can't go at war with your inner aspects and with what is to find your peace. peace rests in you, in the present moment. there is nowhere else where you can look for it. whatever practice can keep your attention present with yourself in the now, that's a good practice for you. if the completion process can do that for you, at least sometimes, at least for a bit, then stay with it. a practice that's good for you is supposed to feel restful.

hugs

Edited by mufhry
adding stuff

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