Guest amy f

Inception

3 posts in this topic

Guest amy f

I was thinking the other day and an idea came to me. If we are reflection of source, as you (teal) have said so, then life is literally an illusion. I thought to myself, 'if life is a reflection of source, then what is the reflection of the reflection? Is it possible to observe the observer? Source cant see itself, so how would it ever know its awake? What if inception is forever? How to know whats real and whats not? This is what pains me deeply. I cant just let go and feel good about the mystery of life. And i also am hurting because, unlike others who find joy in the thought of eternity, i realized, source is all there is (maybe, i dont know) and so even though people like to make it sound nice and say "you are never truly alone" but truly, we are because there is no we. There is only I. And I is forever. Alone. Maybe that's why source created or extended itself? How does this not make you want to kill yourself? it makes me feel more sad. This has been on my mind for a while, for years. But the reflection question came up recently. I also thought to myself, through deeper questioning, which seems never ending, even when i am in a space of presence, a question came to me. I said "I am or am I? I feel like nothing and no one can help me, and maybe i have to do this alone but i am going around in loops just in agony. I feel like existing is agony. What to do? 

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Thats a very good question. I don't blame you at all for the hurt because this summer I have had to ask myself very deep questions about Life, one I asked was if god is everything then can God be a murderer and if I am everything am I that or have I done that? and that hurt me. My answer to mine was no it is the EGO which commits acts out of alignment from the human limited perspective. God is a force beyond love, it is oneness. Ok, so for your question, I do believe everything is a reflection but I believe it is a reflection only by seeing the heart, we are all the same because we are all God which is essentially Oneness but lets call it love. So each thing in extistence is love. But, I do know that means all that exists is just me, so from the highest perspective ever me and you are completely the same. But the thing is, the universe, doesn't even know how it began, how it was born, it wants to know itself through us. I mean, picture yourself with family, or the perfect partner, when u are with them and truly love them, you are loving yourself but at the same time loving them as a perspective, they have had their own journey and story and lives, thus we are also with someone else we can say. Hmmmm, Source does not see itself as alone because it is essentially as all spiritual teachers have said for milleniums, it is beyond love, and to be honest, I have experienced this at a human level when I was reading teals book on self love, I was essentially enjoying what is and taking care of myself, knowing that  I AM the greatest love of my life, the best friend, the love of my life. I was not in need or lack, I was at peace. That's what I think source sees itself as essentially, its literally loving itself by creating us and thus explains why everyone says source loves everyone and judges no one.  New universes, timelines, dimesnions, beings, etc will be created forever , for eternity, right now we live in inception due to the LOA, but Teal has said twice that a new law is coming into place which means a whole new universe will be created and new beings and everything. In terms of what is real, I do not know, maybe nothing is, because everything in existence is a thought, (which truly means our imagination is our greatest gift,). I mean, if source created everything in existence because it was lonely, then why create dimensions and places like Earth where the beings it creates will know the agony and pain of separation. I believ it would have wanted to create friends to understand it. But know this, ur questions will always be answered by the universe, always.

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eternity just being a human would suck, or being stuck on this planet would suck. being stuck in a universe that doesn't evolve would suck.

22 hours ago, amy f said:

And i also am hurting because, unlike others who find joy in the thought of eternity, i realized, source is all there is (maybe, i dont know) and so even though people like to make it sound nice and say "you are never truly alone" but truly, we are because there is no we. There is only I. And I is forever. Alone. Maybe that's why source created or extended itself? How does this not make you want to kill yourself? it makes me feel more sad. This has been on my mind for a while, for years.

I feel separate right now, this is as separate as it gets, I'm like 0.000000000000000001% of the totality of all the awareness, well this is infinite so less? you get the idea. all of those perspectives affect the oneness (god/source) perspective, it wants to know itself through us, we are it, but forgot because its fun? even though time doesn't exist and we are already in the future and fucked up on some timeline, like future humans are greys, you ever hear that? that archetype of the alien head is us in the future. so maybe we can go into another direction, that's how crazy infinite this universe is, time isn't real and all possibilities exist, but it can still change, constantly evolving on all timelines, its a mind fuck. 

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