JuliaKing

my family

6 posts in this topic

I can relate. I felt the same way about some of my family before i left home. You can use the anger to give you the strength to become more self sufficient and strong until you get to a place and time where you can leave home and become your own person. Teal swan talks about this in her discussion on you tube about relationships. your pain can give you power. Your pain can give you strength. Your pain can set you free but then you'll have to work on finding peace and forgiveness once you have taken charge of your life. Pain may give you power and strength in this world but forgiveness gives you power in the next world. Ideally you can forgive them and just walk away.

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@PeaceeLove please-don-t-interrupt-me-while-i-m-igno

Amazing.....ugh......when you get further away, you'll be able to see more  and more just how INSANE their behavior is. ....

are you over 18?  If yes, make an exit plan.  If no, make an exit plan.  How long till you turn 18?  There might be ways for you to get little breaks via school camps and extracurricular activities.  

Its so hard.  Ive felt exactly like you at multiple points; wanting to kill them, and then myself; feeling like I have nothing left to lose, and we'd all be better off dead.  

Thats your body and your emotions telling you its in too much pain, and needs to be protected and that something has to change.  You already can see that your family wont.  Honestly; if you want to make them suffer; find a way to leave and live your life without/beyond them.  Abusive people absolutely suffocate when they lose their favorite reliable punching bag.  Like watching a fish desperately gasping on the deck.  

One thing that was a LIFESAVER for me was that I found the term "narcissistic abuse" and started learning so much---it really applied to my situation and help me start to understand and put into some context behavior and treatment that is so hurtful and otherwise literally makes no sense.  

theres a LOT of info out there, and different kinds of narcissistic abuse, so check out a few and see if any of them describe your situation.  Here are a few videos just to point you in the direction....

 

 

 

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I use to have this problem and still do at times but then I noticed something today, that I was creating my own abuse, I was subconsciously doing the wrong things, little things but constant and I got to the point where they were always annoyed and mean and I thought for no reason, like my mum and dad would ignore me but they actually have hearing problems lol but yes I got to the point where I was so frustrated that I ended up in the space your in, but just before I read this I had a realisation, I was ignoring there plees unknowingly because I forget all the time and causing frustration then when it came back I felt they just hate me, but because I was focusing on my happiness so much I just must have blocked out everyone's else's, today I recognised and took action and the atmosphere has already lifted ^_^

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Thank you @Pastor George, @WildSage, @PROFIT, @elegamtiarum 

I no longer wish to hurt them or myself. I'm deciding to continue with life. I'm feeling great actually. It's probably because the ginseng and the rhodiola but that's a different story.  

 

It's nice to know that I'm not alone and that it's possible to heal from trauma.  Teal inspires me, and I'm inspired by the stories of other people who went through lots of trauma but were able to heal. And now hearing your stories, I don't feel soo alone. 

 

@WildSage I'm 20, and I know that a job is what I need right now to get out of here. I'm struggling with that though

 

I have attempted two jobs but managed to quit them both after 2 days of working. My social anxiety is really bad that keeping a job is hard. I truly believe that my trauma disabled me. I don't know what to do. 

 

I'm going to pre-order Teal's Completion Process to see if that helps. I'm hoping that it'll really help me. But I don't want to get my hopes too high. I have this fear that my situation is the worst case ever on the face of this earth and close to unfixable.  

 

We'll see. 

 

Is there any other books that you guys recommend for someone like me? I'd love to hear. I think I'm actually going to make a new thread for this. 

 

Thanks again guys, I really appreciate it.

 

 

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On 8/24/2016 at 1:45 PM, WildSage said:

@PeaceeLove please-don-t-interrupt-me-while-i-m-igno

Amazing.....ugh......when you get further away, you'll be able to see more  and more just how INSANE their behavior is. ....

are you over 18?  If yes, make an exit plan.  If no, make an exit plan.  How long till you turn 18?  There might be ways for you to get little breaks via school camps and extracurricular activities.  

Its so hard.  Ive felt exactly like you at multiple points; wanting to kill them, and then myself; feeling like I have nothing left to lose, and we'd all be better off dead.  

Thats your body and your emotions telling you its in too much pain, and needs to be protected and that something has to change.  You already can see that your family wont.  Honestly; if you want to make them suffer; find a way to leave and live your life without/beyond them.  Abusive people absolutely suffocate when they lose their favorite reliable punching bag.  Like watching a fish desperately gasping on the deck.  

One thing that was a LIFESAVER for me was that I found the term "narcissistic abuse" and started learning so much---it really applied to my situation and help me start to understand and put into some context behavior and treatment that is so hurtful and otherwise literally makes no sense.  

theres a LOT of info out there, and different kinds of narcissistic abuse, so check out a few and see if any of them describe your situation.  Here are a few videos just to point you in the direction....

 

 

 

@WildSage Thank you for sharing this information. I'm very familiar with narcissistic abuse. I watch Lisa A Romano's videos regularly. She's one of my favorite youtubers. 

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