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  • Latest Posts

    • Day 361 of 365 days 'What would someone who loves themselves do?' If I make a vulnerable post and get four friend requests two from women and two from men, I'm much more likely to accept a women. Is this my self protective bias, or am I right in assuming he sees me as an easy target? I've gone through every one of my facebook friends, including deleting family members to create a safe space. I'm not going to sully that with someone who can't show their face anywhere on their profile, or it looks like they have nothing going on accept silently watching everyone else. Is it wrong to suggest that we both get some positive value out of our association?  I'm not interested in people who portray themselves as a victim because I don't want to paint myself in that light anymore. That includes angry political posts, and things to do with abusive homes and chronic illness. I've been/am there, but I don't want that to define me. Am I an asshole for wanting to see people generally happy and reaching toward empowerment?  I'm guilty of sending a friend request without a message, but as the recipient, I would much prefer some kind of explanation about how we share similar interests, opinions or mutual friends. Are you reading my writing, or do you resonate with my comments? if you are a man, when I post something sexual it is not the time to friend request me. Make a comment, share something vulnerable about yourself, or just follow me and see if you like me as a person before sending a message and asking for friendship. I'm not looking to be part of someone's collection of women. Call me controlling, but I want to be valued for my contribution, not a sexual agenda.  Perhaps I'm projecting big time.  I'm ok with my current methods to keep my space safe, however I'm still open to seeing things differently. Do you have a strategy to keep your social influences aligned with your ideals? 
    • Well I can't resist these sorts of things!   I think all the archetypes have their elements, times and places... but overall, I'm certainly no king, that suggests leadership and a want for dominance (eugh, no way, not for me)... Lover would be nice, but it'd probably be unrealistic to try and claim that, that's a very tiny bit of life for me overall... Warrior is a big candidate here, though I'd like it not to be. Pugilism and adrenaline are fun in the moment, but really unfulfilling ultimately... Magus type is good, I associate that with learning, analysis and it's not incompatible with orneryness. But I feel like that'll be the 'prestige' label. Though it does fit my everday life best: not really at one with the others around me, but habitually using what knowledge and opportunities I have to create opportunities for them. I do what I can, with my knowledge of the world's systems, to help a bunch of people out with whatever's going on. But it might fit the best, thinking about my ideal self, and my more routine everyday self. Certainly, that I talked more about the magus one suggests to me that it resonated best out of the four. So, what's your reasoning? I think it's much more fun when people explain why they pick what they pick. 
    • True Self Thoughts During Near Death Expierience I was in a very bad car accident. If not for the Airbag and seatbelt I would have died. my thoughts during the accident were very different from those that i have heard from anyone else.  I did not see light. I did not have my life flash before my eyes. The thoughts i had were very accepting and nonemotional and it felt as if i new this was coming but had no idea how it would happen. As if that was the only mystery left was what was going to kill me this time. Was it going to be glass the metal from different parts of the car. I even ran through my head a list of stray items flying around with me in the car. Was it going to be one of my precious rocks. Or the pen that ran out of ink that i didnt throw away. I was perfectly fine with the entire expierience until the powder substance from the airbag  resembled smoke and dieing by fire was not ok. Thats when my 3 dimentional self took back over and i found super human strength to kick my crumpled door open and flail from the car. I was screaming but it wasnt me. There was a emotion that seemed to simply be all emotions in one before i went back into my body. This expierience has reaffirmed my belief in my purpose. I did some research and i believe i am a earth angle on a mission. I think i know what the mission is but ever since i have been a bit bi polar on the subject and i feel like time is running out even though time is a 3 dimentional concept. I was hoping you could clarify what happened to me in a way i could understand so i can settle this up and continue my expansion. 
    • I was kinda like you IMO i.e. super generous and it makes my feel a little sick in my stomach to read your post. When I was at school I tried to forgive my tormentors as they tormented me because I thought that it wasn't their fault; I figured they had their reasons as too why they are unhappy and taking it out on me. Super unhappy existence BTW. Later I realized that I'm probably an inverted narcissist and I was made to feel selfish in childhood by an extremely selfish and unloving alpha narcissist father. As a result I came to think, putting myself first was wrong. Anyway, what I've been doing is imagining myself as an innocent baby (back in time, not long after I was born) and saying to him "I'm sorry I let others convince me you aren't as worthy of love or happiness as others", "sorry I didn't stick up for you when I should have and that I didn't truly take responsibility for you", "I fucked up. No one else loves you, so I'm going to love you. You are the most important person in this world to me" etc. If you have developed empathy through suffering then you could direct that energy to your baby self. IMO when I was made to think being selfish was wrong I also came to think being selfless is a virtue. But it's only a virtue too others and not too ourselves. I think/hope we can be our own guardian angels. I can say that I matter because I say so. I decide what that baby is worth. IMO there is no other real measure of ones own worth other than from ones own subjectivity.  I think morality, as an ideology, isn't real. I think real morality comes from inside us and it's individual. IMO accepting who we are means never correcting or fighting our own thoughts or feelings with a (false) ideology, that we were taught. I say this because I have tried being selfless and love and light and I got crushed. Now I'm practicing acceptance of myself and fighting for the baby who no one else ever gave two shits about. Tell me why that baby is worth less than any other? Also explain to me why you think your own baby self is worth less than any other? Will you fight for your baby or continue to let others walk all over you... at least that's what I did and it's why your post made me feel ill... it reminded me of how I used to be. Goodluck. God bless. Edit. Teal helps people because she wants too. You/we don't owe her anything. You might not agree but I'm sure Teal feels this way because, I gather from what she teaches, that she knows that we are only responsible for ourselves and no one else i.e her helping others is up to her. I'm not saying we can't take responsibility for someone in our care but that's personal. Teal isn't our friend, unless you happen know each other personally and are really friends.
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