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#37

What do I not want others to know about me?

(Answer In The Comments Below )
From "100 Of The Most Powerful Questions You Can Ask Yourself"

Nothing has the power to completely alter perspective and therefore your thoughts and actions and life quite like a question. Inquiry leads to understanding. The quality of the answers we arrive at, correspond directly to the quality of question we ask. The better the question, the better the answer. One of the most important things to realize about a question is that a person learns far, far more from the process and work involved in answering a question than from the answer itself. This is why spiritual teachers throughout history (including myself) have tended to pose so many questions to their students rather than to simply offer a direct answer. For this reason, I have selected a collection of 100 of the most powerful questions that you can ask yourself.

Make sure to take time to carefully consider each question that is posed in order to meaningfully answer them. And don’t forget to come back to these questions again and again throughout your life, especially whenever you are feeling stuck, because the answers will most likely change over the course of your life and also cause you to change your course in life.

- Teal Swan


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#37 what do I not want others to know about me?
I have no boundaries, no filters. I often tell the lady at the bus stop my most intimate details and although I feel confident and content to do this, I knew this was wrong somehow by her reaction. I discovered late in life (50 odd) that I am asperges, thus the social keys for me are a mystery. And I see how disastrous it can be with my own aspi kids. 
Be more tolerant humans we are all pure love initially and forever 💝

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That I really do not want to deal with anyone’s crap and that I don’t want to directly be responsible for cleaning up anyone’s fuck ups ,, but I do always try to help because of the whole oneness thing and because their fuck ups are literally parts of the inter connected world we live in so I’ll lightly help a bit 🙄

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Now that would be telling!?! 🤔😅

I don’t have anything spring to mind yet.

Although I have noticed that I haven’t mentioned to anyone much that my dad has had another stroke, just gone blind in one eye & I can feel he’s getting ready to leave his body within a year or so. 
We didn’t have much of a good relationship, in many ways, but I love him. He told me he loves me too today. The first time he ever said this to me was when I was 24 or so, when I nearly died. He has said it occasionally since though.
Something he saves for near death experiences, I guess! 💞😅🕊

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That I am observing my truth about my life and that is that I keep parasiting on some people's help, my good friend,for example who helped me with housing. I have a hard time to be an adult. I feel ashamed of my life , because of my developmental delay...and I feel also jealous and hurt to see many people have a life. I also want simple family life....

....sometimes I also feel as a horrible person because of my emotional waves. I do not want people to also know that I don't want to work in an ordinary job as I happily dream about setting up my own business and becoming a millionaire. These are few things I don't want people to know. 

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I don’t want others to know that I am constantly questioning myself because I’m terrified of admitting to what I really want. I ask for direction from outside sources(blind spot oracle deck, guides, numerology, symbolic posts, this website, etc.) all the time because I’m convinced that making my own choices will result in me being alone and isolated, but I feel that way a lot anyway. When I think that I want or like something I question whether it’s true. I don’t want people to know that I am so afraid and second guessing myself all the time.

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What do I not want others to know about me?

That I have not got my life together after 50+ years!

That I live in isolation because of fear of abandonment.

That I get so angry and depressed I want to die.

That I have deep mistrust and anxiety around men.

That I feel stupid and uneducated academically and emotionally.

That I desperately want help and support but am too scared to ask for fear of being deemed weak and dependant.  

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I do want people to know everything about me.

But there are some truths that some people would not be able to handle, understand, and/or have empathy for.

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I dont like to show my deep struggle und feeling of been lost although my life seems to be" having manifested a big dream of mine", so i look like not that thankfull as i should be, oh my god what kind of a mindfuck🤪

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That I am seemingly  totally split apart on the inside. I feel like I dont know who I am. Silence, my intense emotions and beeing alone overwhelm and scare me at times. That I think about killing myself on a daily Basis. 

I am diagnosed with depression and ptsd 

But to be honest I dont know what is wrong with me.

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On 5/15/2021 at 8:40 AM, Hannah Black said:

I am heterosexual, I had forgotten this for a while. 

Me too.

I felt alot of shame about this, and still though was very open about it.

What Ive learned some people do understand and some just dont.

And now a few years later I actually do think those who dont, do not really love you. 

 

And I know how it feels.

Thank you for your comment.

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It will draw attention to me and I only experienced non acceptance for 'me'. So I'm imagining pain in sharing myself. Clearly it seems I need to just accept this will happen. 

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Consciously: My darkest fears. 

Subconsciously, internally: giving little to no fucks about societal norms, hating human race/society whatsoever. 

I know, I know.. 

Edited by LucyMad
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That I'm alone. And I'm not as happy as I seem. I feel ashamed for feeling alone, and not having many friends. I don't want people to know that I'm going through uncertainty. I want to display that I'm outgoing, fun, funny, passionate, friendly. But behind that, I feel disconnected from people and I struggle with unworthiness, doubt, loneliness, uncertainty. 
 

I guess everyone goes through that behind their facades. As Brene Brown puts in, we all have our "secret shame lives", behind closed doors. Most of the happy faces we're met with, may just be a facade. There is always more beneath the surface that you don't see. Behind a funny, outgoing person, may be the darkest depression and loneliness. Behind a successful person, may be sleepless nights and stress that leads to addiction. Behind a picture perfect family, may be dysfunction and hidden suffering. 

What you see on the outside isn't always the full truth. 

I don't want people to see that I feel lonely, because I don't want them to pity me or reject me and make me feel outcasted. So I put up a happy facade that's friendly and full of laughter. But behind that facade, is loneliness and sadness. 

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